
Child Support & Custody Support Group
This community is dedicated to those involved in child support and custody cases. There are a myriad of challenges involved in any case and this is a safe place to talk about what you're going through with others who may be going through the same. Join the group and seek advice, find or provide a listening ear, or just share your feelings in this support group.

deleted_user
I took my son's biodad back to court because we'd never formalized our agreements. He told me to leave it that way, and he'd voluntarily pay me $150 a month, at least. He said he couldn't afford any more than that and that he didn't want the State to collect it. I said fine. He never paid one dime. Then he kept asking for more things. He moved 95 miles away across state lines. He asked me to do half the driving. I said no. So he kept our son and made me drive. He'd never buy him any clothes or pay for anything for school! He'd make my son pack his own bag to stay there. My son's been recently diagnosed with some emotional problems. Plus he's active in other activities. I took him to court purely to formalize my sole physical and legal custody. After son's biodad had a rage attack at me, I changed my phone number and told him to get his son a cell phone. He wouldn't and said he didn't think he should have to. He has no way to get a hold of me so he calls our mutual friend. Before court when he got served, he left rage messages. After court when I was awarded full physical and legal, he made 5 death threats, all recorded, both to my friend and to my b.i.l. to kill me and our son. According to the courts he can't see our son until we set up visitation and that's not until March. He is pissed at me about this! What did I do? I didn't have control over the date. And I won't call him because he's an ass, but since I don't want to call him, I can't tell him that's why I won't call him. He needs to settle down and be civil. Today's message he said "You need to be an Adult here, and figure out how to get our son's Birthday and Christmas presents, since I can't see him until March."
It's his own fault! I don't know what to do, if he would be a MAN in the first place none of this would have happened. People, I was only asking for $150 a month, and to tell the truth the reason I left is because he was a bully and the reason I agreed was because he was a bully but you know what? He's still a bully and nothing I do will make him stop being a bully! I don't know what to do!
It's his own fault! I don't know what to do, if he would be a MAN in the first place none of this would have happened. People, I was only asking for $150 a month, and to tell the truth the reason I left is because he was a bully and the reason I agreed was because he was a bully but you know what? He's still a bully and nothing I do will make him stop being a bully! I don't know what to do!

deleted_user
Sounds like he did ask for much of this. I would think if he really wanted to do something he could get an emergency hearing to keep some form of visitation, but if he did all those crazy things, no wonder the court said no. Sometimes people run their mouth and say stupid things but those things are things that should never come out of someone's mouth. Its just inconceivable to say those things. Do you feel bad for him? It sounds like you have tried but this is all his fault. He is being a bully - you are right. Its not your fault at all.

deleted_user
Interesting emotion this guilt that we all feel when our x's leave us and abandon their children. THEN...we feel like we need to FIX the problem...a problem that we did not create...I feel the same way sometimes. Like I need to fix his problems. Not so the case. You dont need to fix HIS problems...The court date is in march...good...saver this time with your son...Clearly this guy has some problems that are not your concern anymore. I went through the same thing and still get sucked into it sometimes JUST IGNORE HIM...DO NOTHING...LET THE COURT TAKE CARE OF IT...words to live by...DO NOTING...there is nothing to do until march, so just enjoy your time...

deleted_user
the more you give the more he will push.....stick to what the courts say. if you got along the court would not be involved. also the more you talk the more the child picks up on.
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