I have been through this once. Demand (nicely of course) that everything is documented - receipts. Even if her mother is giving her receipts (most likely fake) try and see if she is claiming the income on her tax return. I wish you the best. Julie

Thanks, for your advice Julie. I would hope that the child support agency would verify on his ex's tax forms that this claim is true, but at this point we think it is probably false. Before I was with him, he has his origianl child support amount based on her putting the kids in a daycare at $13,500 a year and the week the divorce was final she took them out and had her mom watch them.

So the ex just up and changed the childcare and now its more money and she wants him to help pay? I don't understand how she could change it if it was not comparable to what she was paying (or maybe she just got a job & this is new?) And next year the child will start school so that should go down or away also. Sorry - I don't nkow what a child support review is, but I thought decisions like this were supposed to be agreed on by both parties. I know a mom who insisted on private school so she had to pay for it herself.

Apparently in Ohio, you can request a review every 3 years with the Child Support Agency. When his ex took the kids out of daycare the week their divorce was final, it was three years ago and my husband didn't think he could do anything about it. Now that one child is in school and the other (4 yr. old) is being watched by grandma (who they still live with). Apparently grandma is more expensive than the daycare. My husband doesn't mind paying child support but he doesn't want to be paying for sevices that are false, as his ex has no living expenses either. If grandma is really being paid, then his support order would go down. We enjoy having his kids around but we want to be able to afford to do things with them too.

oops, I meant if grandma is not really being paid, then his support order should go down. My husband has requested a new review and stated that he does not agree with the child care amounts. His mother (the other grandmother) would babysit for half the cost his ex is supposedly paying.

My fiance was threatened by his son's mother that she was going to "screw him over" and raise his child support to what she thinks he deserves to pay. He called CSS (in KS) and talked to his case worker and explained his pay cut, his registration to college, etc. The case worker sent him paperwork to get the $$ reviewed, and while she said it won't ever go down, it won't be raised much and that the mother needs to stop threatening him. The mother is currently unemployed and living off her parents. She just finished college herself with a nursing degree...we are not completely sure WHY she isn't working...she is not hurt, no disability... My fiance pays child support for both his sons who have different mothers and he keeps in close touch with his CSS case workers in both states and he has had great success with not falling behind, getting things worked out, and most of all neutralizing threats from the mothers i.e. lies, fake expenses. He has also established credibility with these organizations and that is very helpful, especially when the mother's try to be dishonest. Document everything. Keep a nice tone of voice. These things can take you a long long way, especially the fathers. Good luck to you.

Hi dar91 - I know exactly what you meant when you said "We enjoy having his kids around but we want to be able to afford to do things with them too." We want to be able to buy the kids clothes and do lots of things for them but when mom sits home and her two kids are in school and my husband pays 100% of the child support while his ex pays 0%, we can't afford to do too much. The laws are just frustrating. I think you have a real good case if his mom has agreed to watch the kids as a more reasonable cost. If they have joint custody they need to agree on the childcare. And if her mom is charging at much as daycare, that's just not normal. If you say she lives w/ her mom, its probably what she gives her in rent and she is calling it child care. Ugh! Good luck to you - its so frustrating!!!

Money is the least of my worries. My mil is paranoid schizophrenia. I dont want her to watch kids . x still dose it.

Wow it sounds to me like you are getting raked. My husbands ex used tried to say that at 13 or 14 she was still paying $400 a month for daycare. She started leaving her alone at 10. Needless to say it didnt work for her. Maybe he could ask for receipts showing that she paid her. But then that should bring the IRS in to play, if she provides them, then her mother should be claiming the income. Dont know the whole situation, but I doubt that there is little if any money being paid or claimed. Okay, sorry to ramble :)