The day basically just started for me... My mom already had to give my grandfather morphin... he seems really weak. It was 7 when he called me in and he was still in bed... he's normally up and eating his breakfast no later then when my mom leaves at 5:30... I have a feeling the time is real close though... our dogs all followed me into the room and it was a pain getting them out... the 1 I had to carry out cause every time I opened the door she ran right back in. The 1 that normally spends all day with him stood at his door for at least a half hour yesterday barking cause nobody let her in after the hospice nurse left.... they say he had 2-6 months left but I don't think it will be that long... My aunt is coming Friday, is cousins are coming Saturday and sometime this weekend my cousins are supposed to come... maybe that's what he was waiting for... a chance for everyone to say goodbye to him. I don't wanna say goodbye though...
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??