do any of you have that for a loved one? i had to go through a trial, with a jury, and 3 specialists that evaluated my mom and swore in court that she is unable to make decisions of any kind due to the severe global aphasia from the stroke. 12 jurors deliberated for 2 hours, going over the medical records from the stroke and the testimony of the specialists, who all said mother was in no way able to understand 95% of what is said to her and that her answers would be a literal crap shoot, might be right, might be wrong. when they came back it was unanimous to give me guardianship, and it was written as no limits medical and financial. i asked what did that mean, the judge said that basicaslly i am her voice, since i had already sat with her everyday for a yr i probably know how to "read"her and that i will speak for her and even over rule what she says and no one can go against it. have any of you done this? i am now in the struggle of making the nursing home staff understand that even though when they ask my mom if she needs her diaper changed and she says no, which she always says, they need to check her her, not ask. i have a picture on my phone camera of her sitting in her chair and feces all the way up to her shoulders, i smelled it the minute i walked in, i asked her if she neded changed she said no, i called tech and nurse and asked them when was the last time they check her nurse said"i asked her if she needed changed and she said no" i told nurse to go look at her back side, and then told her that is why you do not ask, you check. i will show that picture to the administrator. she cant use utinsils, her right side is paralyzed, she was right handed, and left side is weak and uncordinated from second stroke so she is suppose to have finger foods, she wont let anyone feed her. she wants to feed herself. i get there tonight, she had jello pie, turnips greens, mashed sweet potatoes and two pieces of bread a glob of penutbutter on one piece and glob of jelly on the other and made into sandwhich. i called nurse, who got mad cause she said that is dietary job, i told her i was insrtucted to call her first, dietary comes in and says that is finger foods, she can pick that food up with her hand, excuse me? i picked the jello pie up, it slipped though my fingers like soup, the turnipgreens, same thing, didnt go any further, dismissed her and took the tray to the admin and asked her if this is her version of finger foods. she asked where did i get that tray, i showed her the ticket with my mothers name on it and asked her exactly how is she suppose to eat these foods with her fingers and told her to take a look at that sandwhich, i would not feed to a starving dog. as i left the office i heard her tell the assistant to get dietary there right now, lol! hope she got her asss chewed for that. they need to just get her up in her chair for a couple of hours everyday, do not ask, just do it, i have a schedule in the care plan, not being followed. i do give leeway, if mother is just very fussy about getting up or going back to bed then try later, but she can not lay in bed everyday unless there is a documented medical reason for it. one day ok, second day, there better be a medical reason. too many things happen when someone is left in bed everyday. anyways, they told me they wanted to have a metting tomorrow about all the other bs and to discuss my guardianship, as if they have some kind of say. the judge told me that as long as what i decide will not harm my mother or deprive her of her needs being met and that my actions are to keep her safe and well taken care of then no one can over rule me. the admin at nursing home thinks i am an idiot i think, i have been doing this with mother for 3 yrs, they tell me she understands everything they say and they understand her completely, bull! she cant even tell you my name most of the time, idiots. if i walk in there and they have a lawyer in there, i am going to listen to what they consider the definition of my guradianship is and then adjourn the meeting telling them i will let them know what date i am available again with my own representation. idiots. my mom had therapy for a full yr, nothing, not anything got throught to her, they want to eval her for speech and all the other bs she went through and could not grasp. idiots. When God takes her out of this misery i will be so grateful for her, and then i will be certified to advocate for other people like her that nursing homes think they know what is best and they do not have a fricken clue. everyone knows all nursing homes are the same. i went through this exact same thing for the first three months after i got the court order, after three months of me first tring to be nice, then being firm and explaining my guardianship, then just telling them, do as i say or i will have the judge come and explain to them exactly what she meant when she gave me the guardianship they started listening to me. guess i will ask the judge to write a letter or something telling them to back off and do their jobs like the law says for them to do. idiots.
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