Well, I've been battling this since October of 2005. I finished 16 months of weekly chemo at the end of February. Have heart damage from chemo, had my 6th MUGA last Monday, I know it's not good. I feel horrible. Everything hurts, I can't think. That's probably a combination of my 3 kids and chemo brain. I feel like running away or hiding or something. I'm tired (literally) and tired of feeling crappy. It's hard not to be scared when you constantly hear of the recurrence happening. I did the Race for the Cure and that was tough both physically and mentally. Last eve, I did a Survivor walk at a Relay for Life and one of the high schoolers that started this Relay had passed away between last years and this year. Her mom spoke and I could only think of the insurmountable pain she must be feeling. My mind is all over the place. Anyone feel like attempting to soothe this for me?? :) You would think after all the appointments and doctor visits this would be old school for me and yet I feel a little forboding about this appointment and I can't shake it.
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