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Im really struggling with life in general at the moment and people (largely those who dont really understand what Im going through) tell me I need to think positive!!
Can someone please tell me what this means and how to go about it!!
I dont deliberately look for the negatives, they just seem to be over-powering at times, and this is usually when life is at its lowest point. I want to look for the positives but when everything in life has a negative edge or is just down right horrid how can I??
All advice and words of wisdom gratefully received.
thanks
Can someone please tell me what this means and how to go about it!!
I dont deliberately look for the negatives, they just seem to be over-powering at times, and this is usually when life is at its lowest point. I want to look for the positives but when everything in life has a negative edge or is just down right horrid how can I??
All advice and words of wisdom gratefully received.
thanks
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The basic idea behind thinking positive is that if you focus on positive things, they will actually happen.
This isn't too far from the truth.
Hey everyone, it's time for some cognitive learning!!
Imagine you have a triangle. At the top of the triangle is your thoughts.
On the bottom right, your feelings.
On the bottom left, your thoughts.
All three of these things affect each other. And sometimes, they work themsevles into a spiral that is hard to pull out of.
The easiest one to change is your actions. You have the most control over those.
Next, you have your thoughts. A little more difficult sometimes, but you can still change what you think about.
Then last but not least, your emotions. They kinda slow as far as learning goes, but if the other two are doing something positive, your emotions will catch up eventually.
Lists help. Being able to visualize what you're doing, what you're trying to focus on is extremely helpful.
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My life really sucks at this time... actually, in all honesty and objectivity, it was never as bad as now... but this morning I was so excited about running for 1 hour straight without lower back pain! See... delusional, irrational, blind, superficial thoughts... but they sure work.
Otherwise something I try to do is make sure once a day you find one thing that is a positive. (I got the parking spot I wanted, someone held the door open for me, I saw a beautful deer cross the street) and eventually you notice those things more. The key, apparently, is to write it down. Hope it helps.
Thanks for the reminder.....
Also thanks cshel, I used to be really good at smiling no matter what....Ill practice.
I also like the delusion thinking newinpitt...
oooo and a positive thought...you all were here to help me :D
Thanks everyone
One thing I do is find one thing during the day that makes me happy. It's either walking the dog, or meditation, or I just tell myself that I will be okay. Some days it's a lot harder than others, but one thing pleasurable is my reward for just being and going through this stuff.
Still chewing on that one.
I try to think positive by trying to tell myself if yes, this marriage is really over, I will grow from it, get better for it (tons of therapy) and that one day I'll be able to get over him, let go and forgive myself for my part.