so sorry to hear that you are going throughthis. you are not alone . my stbx told me almost 2 years ago he didnt feel loved or like loving. had thought about leaving me when i was in the hospital for cripe sake, and thought he could wait til aour boys were older so he'd just pack his shit and leave. did he give you a reason why he's leavingyou? i now am told he just doesnt want to be married to an angry woman anymore.

hi
sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time. think positive... at least he's been honest with you. you know how he feels and you can cry... and move on. my ex is keeping me "hanging on" to hope. he tells me he is very sorry that he is loosing me, and at the same time he goes out to his "friends" and doesn't come back till late at night.acting like any single person with no commitment in the world. this makes it very difficult to me to accept it is over.I keep clinging to hope.
I believe you should do your crying and move on, but be sure it won't be easy.

My stbxwife said something similar. She said she didn't feel like she was in love anymore and that we should try a seperation. I did not agree to it because her job already requires her to live in another state and we were barley talking anyway. I felt like we were already seperated and that we needed to talk about what the real issue is between us.
She kept pushing me away and she finally admitted there was someone else. I asked for a divorce because she was more interested in preserving her new relationship than working on our own.
I wanted to know the reasons why she threw our relationship away and she started bringing up things I did when we were kids. I had to remind her that we were both immature and she did all of the same things to me. The bottom line is I felt she was reaching for any excuse to justify her neglecting our relationship. She just wanted whatever she wanted more than what was in our best interest. Don't believe all that junk about you being some angry person. Alot of us are provoked by our stbx's and they neglect to say I know that they did ....and thats what made you so angry. They always prefer to paint a picture of you as someone just walking around waiting to be upset at any little thing.

If someone has made up their mind it may be in your best interest to let them go. It will not feel good but it will be the right thing.
People always want what they cant have more than what is readily available. If he knows how much you want him, he feels he can test this new thing out and if it doesn't work he can come back to you, apologize promise to be better and you will take him back.
They have already taken your heart don't GIVE them your self respect. The right thing does not always feel right. Let them go you will respect yourself for standing up for what you want in life. It will not be easy but he doesn't respect you now. If you are strong and stand up for what you want the both of you will respect you and chances are he will try to come back, then it will be YOUR decision if you want to pursue a relationship with someone that pushed your feelings to the side.

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. Lots of us have been down the same road unfortunately and it's not a good place to be. I was sort of in the same position several years ago. my stbx insisted he loved me but needed his "friends" - all of whom were women, by the way. I made myself sick obsessing over it. Yes, I begged him to cut off contact, yes I accepted all the blame for our problems...

My solution was to force myself out of my comfort zone. I made new friends, found new interests, etc. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done, especially since at the time I had no self confidence whatsover. I know it sounds cliched, but it really helped. And one day, in the middle of discussing yet AGAIN, why our marriage was so screwed up...I realized that it didn't matter. I'd be better off without him. For me, it was an epiphany. Nothing was the same after that moment.

What I'm trying to say is that you deserve better. You need to concentrate on what lies ahead for you, and realize that although you might have to cut your losses, you'll be better off without someone who says he doesn't need you... And you will be. That's the great thing :)

I'm so glad i've joined daily strength.
I don't feel alone anymore. now I know there are people out there who understand me.
it is very dofficult to admit to my friends and family that I still want him back. I feel ashamed of my feelings. they can't undrestand it after all that I've been through. so I play the hard one and put on a brave face.
so I'm pleased some of you have felt like this before and still were able to turn your lives around and start a new life. that means there's still hope for me.
thanks for your support

no one can understand your situation if they haven't been there before. there are a lot of people here who will support you and offer advice and care because they DO know how you feel. Hope that you stick around as you work through things and let us know how you're doing.

I'm always amazed on thie how similar everyone's stories are. There are so many people who absolutely understand what we are all going through. It is wonderful support here as DS. Goot that you are here.

I want to share something with all of you. I saw this on D.S. a few months back and I posted it in my journal. It is alittle painful but, it has really helped me and I hope it will help you aswell. If you need to talk I am here for you. MAY GOD GIVE YOU COMFORT AND PEACE. Remember you are not alone.

It is called, "LET IT GO" by
T.D. Jakes.

Your friend,

Lisa
abusehurts

I understand how you feel,it's like a rock is on your chest,it feels like you are the only one this is happening to....the worries,the kids,the money,the ANGER the HURT the SADNESS and feeling of "whats so horrible about me?''
ITS NOT YOU,WE CANNOT CHANGE OTHERS and their warped views of the world.
Remember,no one can make you feel inferior without your consent

You deserve better.I'm here for you!

you should NEVER EVER have to BEG someone to stay with you.... even though sometimes we want to b/c we are afraid of the unknown. sad truth is, you can't control someone else...they have to WANT to be with you else the relationship isn't healthy.

I have been there and I know exactly how you feel. My best advice is to really take care of yourself, go out and do STUFF, and try as best you can to NOT try to control the situation.

Right now you won't believe this, because you are in your darkest hours. It will get better. You will get on with it, and you will get over it. You will get better. You will have the realization that you will be OK.... and you will be. Stick with us here, there are so many who will help you along in learning to believe in you again. *hugs* I'm sorry you are going thru this, but trust me, you will come out on the other side.

Stop torturing yourself. You are suffering and he is clearly telling you he is done. He may in some sick way enjoy how you are begging. He needs to move out if he has already moved on. His saying that "his friends are all pleased for him" was an intentionally hurtful comment. Don't let him do that to you anymore.

I totally understand your physical reactions, stomach in knots, can't breathe, hard to function, hard to walk and talk, hard to look others in the face. Know it will get better in time.

We are all here for you.