
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
the pain i feel now,i cant deal with it...it feels as some1 has tore my heart out.i have been with my part6ner 4a while now and i was certain he was the one,i thought he felt the same as he told me so every sinfgle day of our relationship,how much he loved me n wnted to be with me 4ever..he made me a meal on friday nite n i had a wonderful nite, he was all over me tellin me how happy he was to be with me n he loved me more than anything...onli later to tell me he didnt love me and he never has,that it was all lies. He doesnt want to see or speak to me ever again and i dont know why i didnt do anything wrong i lvoe him so much n i just dont know what to do i cant stop cryin.
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But within a matter of two days things took a 180 degree turn from going away on vacation and planning on future, to her never coming back. She didnt want to talk about it or to me, or anything. But I still defended that there was no way there was another guy.
Months later I found out there was. Two weeks before she "went away for a few days" her sister gave some guy her number that saw my ex one night at her sisters house. 2 weeks later she is gone.
So I would put my money on that. It isnt you, it is his selfishness most likely to want to be with someone else as well.
You have tried to call him, maybe send him a text or email and he isnt responding. So I would stop contacting him. A lady friend told me that I need to not contact her, dont let her know she gets to me. If she does, she will keep it up. Take away her power by not contacting her. Not emailing her and not answering her calls or emails immediately when she contacts you.
She suggested when she calls and if I answer it, turn up the music before you answer the phone, pretend like there are people over, etc. This did work ... she was out having fun with some married guy, but she didnt like I was having friends over for dinner, or there was a girl over at the apt. there really wasnt a girl, I just asked her to hold once when she was on the phone, muzzled it and pretended I was talking to someone. That was all it took.
She said no silly love songs, dont make a mix tape or anything. :)
Show her the same respect she shows you. You need to have respect for yourself through this.
If you have laid your feelings out there, you ahve done what you can. You now need to quit expecting to hear from him, try not to contact him as it will only make it worse for you really.
If you have any friends, try to go over to their house even if not to talk about it, but to just be around people. While I sat at some peoples place I knew, my mind was on her, but I was out of the house and was able to get a chuckle in here or there as the kids did something stoopid or whatever.
My dog helped a lot as I started to spend time with her more. Maybe get yourself a pet, that will help with the loneliness some times.
i kno he wont call me ,he kept syn it was over he didnt love me .But how?...how could anybody do that?!i dont believe him completely,if he didnt love me he wudnt have said it 4so long everyday,he wudnt have done the things he did 4me,he was so gud to me
this is why it is harder,ther eis no reason 4what he is doing,and the fact he is basically saying the whole relationship was a lie on his part it hurts lik hell
i know i cannot just never see him again i need to evn if just friends.it was so random he jus said he didnt love me after tellin me he did.
Surely he cant just erase me from his life completely?
i feel pathetic,feelin so much for him wen he is hurtin me so much but i cnt hlp the way i feel if i could turn it off i would
but basically, it is hard. When you see someone everyday, they become very important in your life. For me, we were best friends too. So I also lost my best friend. Everything we did together, I now have to do alone. At first, even when I went to the Gas station, I would see her walking out with drinks as we didn so often. It was mainly by habit all these things. but it wasnt making it easier, nor did I feel better.
But he is at least being straight out with you that it is over. Many people, including myself, never even got that. You can sit and wonder what happened, why was he so good to me and it stopped all of the sudden? How can people do this to someone so quickly, so relentless and not even a little bit of respect for all you have been through with them
I thnk a lot of people have gone through this and there is never an answer except what we see physically from them. In time, it will come to you as to what happened. many people see the signs as time goes on as to things that were right there. I didnt see it, and still dont. It was just as random as can be for me as well.
If he wont talk to you about it, then he is hiding something, or he just doesnt want to deal with it. Some feel not dealing with it, will make the other person go away. It is a cowards way out, but many do it.
Sounds like he is being selfish right now and has found something he thinks is better and can replace what you's had.
now i feel worthles
am i not gud enuf for him to love me?
i just wish it wud all go away im fed up of cryn all day tho i cnt hold it in
What I saw was:
- she was with someone older (married)
- she chucked all responsibilities and previous life and friends
- she was drinking a lot
- she found someone with a house, jacuzzi, and pool in the backyard
- she found someone with a business, rather then a job
- she was not the person I knew for 7 years, but was who he was.
- she found someone who never made her look at herself
- she found someone to persuade her that leaving her whole life behind including her career, was best for her
- someone I never knew and wouldnt want to be with.
So seeing these things finally a few months later, really hit me and realized there was nothing I did or could have done. I didnt miss anything. It wasnt me, it was on her to be faithful and work at having fun with our relationship, not chucking it for fun with some married guy she just met and cared more about then me.
But these are some things you can try to to deter the crying, deter your brain from thinking about him and to keep your idle hangs busy.