Its hard to let go. we have all done it as well.

I'm sorry you are going through this. I was never at the point where I wanted to call my ex after the divorce took place. We did have several long conversations but they were usually a result of trying to help the kids or clearing the air after misunderstandings or trying to come to an agreement about other issues. I didn't want to talk to her otherwise. Good luck.

I call my ex alot usually asking him questions about selling the house, or cooking or something. I miss him and still don't understand why we have to get divorced, we never even had a fight.

My hubby and I still talk too. I'm sure sometimes he wonders why he bothers. Conversations start off good but more often than not they end in arguments. Last night we talked for hours..nmo arguing (thank God). The fact of the matter is that although we are divorcing we still truly love one another and at one point and time were best friends. It's hard losing someone who meant so much. Neither of us want to got through this but I feel I have no choice. Give yourself a little slack. Everything is not black and white..you just happen to be living in the grey right now.

You keep calling her for a couple of reasons.

1. Even though you may have people to talk to, it only feels better when you talk to her. It may be because you are used to talking to her or because she can answer questions you feel other people cannot

2. You have been married for years you get used to talking to someone even if you don't have much to say. Especially if you havent found a new love interest to talk to.
You are, like all of us, a junkie. You are addicted to this person and with them not being there you are going through withdrawl. I think with time the urges to call her will ease away.

Realize that if you want her back now or anytime in the future calling her only pushes her away. You don't have much to say to each other and she probably feels like she has more power and authority in the relationship. Unfortunately she doesn't respect you right now, believe me none of our stbx's do if they did they wouldn't treat us this way. Calling her only makes you look weaker. You will feel better and she will call you if you fall off of her radar and take the time you need to heal yourself.

Hope this helps I am in the exact same situation.

I am on month 3 and jus recently managed to stop calling almost daily. The urge is still there a lot and it takes incredible discipline not to call. And yes, calling her a lot will only push her away further. Do not call ( I can't even follow my own advice here). I know how hard it is. Stay strong.