Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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When do you know it's time to pack in the bags.

deleted_user
deleted_user
When has that line been crossed? I feel like my wife is trying to ignore me. We haven't been happy for a few months at least but lately it has been getting worse. She works flexible hours as a care provider and lately she finds excuses to stay an hour later. When she comes home she says hi to the kids and ducks outside for a smoke and a chat without saying hi to me. She doesn't talk to me.
I want to save my marriage but not if I can't save myself. I want to send a better message to my kids. I mean, what if I can't make it alright again? What if this time its the end? I don't even know how to judge that. I just don't know.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Talk to her about it. Women usually move on before letting on. Good Luck.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I try. I told her I was hurting. I told her I wanted to talk and be open. She said she wanted to fix this and went on doing what she was doing.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Do you try to hug her, or touch her, without asking anything in return?

Talk to her about silly things?

Take an interest in what She likes?

Small things can go so much farther than lots of talking.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Make a counseling appointment. Don't delay. Do it today. It seems like you both want to fix this but don't know how. Don't let another moment pass without getting professional help. Let her know what you intend to do, set up the appointment, arrange for a babysitter and get yourselves over there. It is not too late.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Ditto on everything so far! Communication is key! Let her know what you're feeling and how much she, and the family, mean to you. Try to find out what issues SHE has, too...if you don't already know.
deleted_user
deleted_user
The same thing was happening to me. My husband was basically avoiding me. I don't know if it will work for you but I told my husband if he was interested in all at saving our marriage he needed to sit down and talk to me otherwise our marriage would be over. I don't know if it was wrong or right to give him an ultimatum like that but i know he sat his ass down and really talked to me and although the conversation didnt make things completely clear it did help.
Ending a marriage is a hard thing to do. No one can tell you if its wrong or right because you and your wife are the only one's in the marriage.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Why I stay at work even if I don't have work to do.... I got tired of him asking 20 questions and I could never give him the answers he wanted, I got tired of him accusing me of doing things I didn't do (cheating).

Best way to approach your wife is to tell her YOU are missing the time you used to spend together and what can YOU do to make things better....DO NOT expect her to have an answer right away and do not do it right when she walks in the door because it puts her in the defensive. You have to use "I" statements as the shrinks would say because it somehow works.
CanadianRose
CanadianRose
perhaps working this out on your own is not a solution... suggest counselling to your wife as a way to open up communication better and to be able to move the relationship forward and to find solutions.

I am an advocate for counselling.. I wish my spouse had done it... we would of gotten to the root of the unhappiness 15 years ago.. I still don't know what happened.
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