
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
My husband left me two weeks ago today. the first I knew he would even dream of it was when I was blindsided by a note on the door when I got home from work. He already had an apartment and sounded like he had already moved on. I also discovered that he had met someone on line and had had a tryst with her. Then I asked him to come tell me in person why, etc. He did, and after that, he did a 180 and came home, cancelled the apt., etc. Yesterday we celebrated our 30th anniversary.
My problem is that I am glad to have him back, but I can't get the sick, panicky feeling to go away for long. I want to know what we as a couple need to do to avoid this happening again. I'm not perfect, but God knows I've been a faithful, loving wife. I want to get this woman out of my mind, but I don't want to just dismiss it as trivial. It kills me! I don't say anything for fear I'll be "nagging" or demanding too much, as he says I have.
My problem is that I am glad to have him back, but I can't get the sick, panicky feeling to go away for long. I want to know what we as a couple need to do to avoid this happening again. I'm not perfect, but God knows I've been a faithful, loving wife. I want to get this woman out of my mind, but I don't want to just dismiss it as trivial. It kills me! I don't say anything for fear I'll be "nagging" or demanding too much, as he says I have.
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So my first thought is sorry or apologetic to this blatant disregard for you? Is he remorseful. Does he talk about it or ignore the situation. What is he offering to do to change and discuss why he would do this in the first place? It bothers me that you are afraid to upset him, look at what he just did to you, you have a right to be very upset. It is not trivial. Please get yourself into counseling, make sure who you find is a fit, it might take a couple of people to truly find someone who you feel comfortable with. We all play a part but make sure you take care of yourself. If he does this again are you financially OK?? If not you might think about what you should do, stash money open a checking account in your name only etc. Good luck, keep us posted!We all know how much this hurts, you are not alone.