I've been separated from my husband for 3 1/2 years and living successfully on my own. We've been living a cycle of separation and reconciliation throughout this time. I haven't talked to him since before Halloween, and he "silently" filed for divorce on December 1st. Meaning - he didn't tell me he was going to file. I got the papers in the mail from the court and the final hearing is February 6th. I made a commitment not to see him or talk with him until after the divorce is final. He has tried a couple of times to make contact but I haven't responded. He's gone so far as to leave a voice mail saying "you can keep me from being married to you, you can keep me from seeing you, but you can't keep me from caring about you". He filed, for crying out loud, I didn't. Last night he texted me to say "I would like you to consider having dinner with me one evening". I haven't responded to any of his attempts to contact me, resolved in my decision to break the cycle of off again-on again that I've been in with him since we separated. The date is getting closer and he is tugging at me now, and I'm getting scared. I want to stay resolved, and I believe I will, but my heart is wrung up like an old dishrag today. I can't see him, and I need encouragement to stay within the boundaries I set for myself. I don't know if I'm really asking for advice, but I joined this group tonight looking for support to get me through this and keep me from hearing the kindness in his voice and denying myself the right to my solitude. And hoping to make some new friends along the way....my friends carry me through times like this. Long post, sorry :) Blessings xo
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