For those of you who know my story, you know that I just recently finalized my divorce last Wednesday. After nine years, three miscarriages, and irreconcialable differences my husband and his mistress made it apparent to me that it was over. I found out that they are expecting and have posted it all over mutual friends' myspace pages. When I logged in today it auctomatically shows when someone on your friends list has uploaded photos and BAM there it was. The sonogram of their baby boy. I know some of you all have endured the loss of a preganancy/child as I have. I feel as though that was supposed to be my life - and SHE'S living it now. I'm desperately seeking guidance from my DS friends. Encouraging words, insight, anything really that someone has said to uplift you. I feel like I'm going thru the pain of miscarriage all over again. My heart is absolutely broken.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??