On 1/13/17 at 6:01 pm, my wife of 30 years came home from work, sat down, said you are not going to like this. I am divorcing you! A complete surprise. We are best friends. I cried for 72 hours. Go in and out of total emotional caos. She said she loves me but not in love with me any more. I am trying to figure out how to deal with all these feelings.
Here are some of the issues:
1. We own a very successful busniss together and that is our only income. We will have to work together for the rest of our lives since this is our only way to make a living.
2. We have to live together until we sell off our assets and break the new to our grown children.
3. I am still in love with her and can not let that go.
4. Divorce is not really an option to me. It is for life until death do part.
So how do I proceed with a new life when I can not bare the thought of seeing her with someone else. I know she is a special person that will find someone very quickly. I feel like I will react in a negatively and attemp to distroy her ability to have another life. Why should she deserve to move on when I am not able to do so?
I am also obsessing over where she is when she is not around.
Tell me how to deal with these issues. It is what it is but sometimes that does not work in my mind.
I am at a better place with my ex and his wife than I have ever been. I can actually have a conversation with him on the phone and keep my cool. When either one of them does something annoying I just do an eyeroll, chalk it up to them being them, and move on with my life. What I'm struggling with is the double identity crisis. Years ago I went to going away party for my mother when she...
This is a link by Darlene Lancer https://www.whatiscodependency.com/trauma-abuse-breakups-divorce-ptsd/#more-13463 about abusive relationships and moving forward.After reading this and speaking to my therapist by phone today, as I progress through the begining of trauma work I'm finding that this article speaks to 'me codependent' to what I hope to achieve Some Day as 'Me, healed of...