Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

11,854 Members
100,053 Posts
0 Online
Relationships & Sexuality
/ Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Stranger in the house

julik
julik
Since stbx officially announced that he was leaving the marriage, leaving the house 3 weeks ago, (he's supposed to move out this Saturday), it is just like there is some other person in the house that I don't have a clue as to who he is. It's as though we don't have any history between us even. He looks different, his tone of voice is different, he projects himself differently, there are no words exchanged between us, and we avoid each other (or at least I avoid him) as much as possible - pretty much I stay up in my bedroom, watch tv there, eat meals out of the house (this is my house that he moved into). But the personality of this man now - it is really like there is some stranger in the house who I don't have a clue of who he is. We don't argue or anything, because we don't talk to each other. I'm not so sure that I could talk to him because I'd either start to cry or get mad. We don't have any children, so its not like we have to exchange any information. I think having a room-mate would be more comfortable than what is going on now. It is so bizzare, has anyone else experienced this? Too bad, so sad :(
deleted_user
deleted_user
We don't speak either. He looks at me with complete hate in his eyes. He wants me gone so bad and it is killing me. How can this be the same person who spent weeks planning a tenth wedding anniversary trip for us to this only a week later. I don't know him.
deleted_user
deleted_user
We tried to reconsile briefly after she left the first time. It was no different, it was all about her. Was glad when she left again. I tried.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I feel like I don't know who my wife is either. We haven't reached a decision but I keep thinking if it doesn't changed then I will be man enough to be "the villain" of our story. I feel like she wants out more than she wants to stay but she doesn't want to be the bad guy. I want her to be happy, preferrably with me, but if it has to be without me then so be it. I want my kids to know that happiness is not a crime. I want to be happy as well. I'm going to start looking into counseling for us, myself, parenting classes. But yeah, I feel like she is my roommate. I get more affection from my cat. I never ever thought I would wind up in this land. WOW!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am in a similar situation. In my case the divorce is final. He has really become a stranger to me as well. We have kids so we have to interact with each other. I thank God that things are peaceful and we are civil. It is just odd now after sharing my life iwth him for 10 years and now this. I would rather have a real room-mate than to have to deal with this. Hell, I would rather be alone with my boys than to endure this.

How can I move on?
deleted_user
deleted_user
It is sad. My wife told me she wanted to a separation in late August, but she didn't move out until December 1st.

Its hard to know how to be in that period of time. At first, you try to talk, and be there for them, trying to work on things, but without any success, eventually I had to throw in the towel, and literally we were reduced to two roomies...and nothing more.

After knowing her for 17 years, it was hard to see us so far apart, like we didn't even know much about one another. It would have been easier if she just moved out quickly...but in our case it wasn't in the cards...

...so I totally understand everything your saying....
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sounds like the last few weeks of my marriage-total stranger-not even friends-except when he wanted to get off sexually-then he was my husband-oh and he still wahted his meal hand delivered to him in what was once our bedroom-but I had been run off to the couch. Its weird-I would lay on the couch and think I live with someone who could care less he I fell off the face of the earth-i am still friends and still socialize with several people I have been roomates with in the past and I will never see or talk to the person I gave my body heart and soul to again-weird.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sometimes, nothing makes sence, and I just listen to songs.

Chain Gang?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEZ2eUd7cC0
Posts You May Be Interested In
  • irishwriter

    come unwind in the bp lounge

    Posted by: irishwriter
    Last Reply: kisses2016
    7992
    theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
  • Rizen

    Walk a Day

    Posted by: Rizen
    Last Reply: mujicaptsd
    2570
    I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...