Kinda, except that you have to actually see the person you are mourning and habits with that person have to end! I remember the first time that I saw my ex, while we were going through our divorce, that I had the biggest urg to sit next to him in the court room! How strange is that?

Apparently they are very similar. People can expect to go through
Shock, Denial, Bargaining (trying to change the situation), Anger, Depression and Acceptance.
These stages do not appear in any particular order and you can go through a stage several time. Acceptance is what it will all lead up to eventually.
It is a tough journey but I wish you strength and you will get through this.

Similar. Loss, grief, anger - but with the death of a love one - you have the hope that they are in a better place. With divorce, you have fear and more anger and want to ask questions and feel like you can still save your marriage. I am going through the same thing you are but also - if i go home I feel like I need to run nonstop - where I do not know but just do not stop until I feel safe and loved.

Not sure what the stages are, but the ups and downs are difficult.

I had a meeting the other week with a vendor I had never met, and into the conversations she asked if I was married...I just started crying in front of her out of the blue. I was shoked and embaressed. Thank god I have not repeated that. SO EMBAREESSING.

Absolutely. Of course they come in unpredictable waves...often referred to as the "roller coaster". First you can't believe it, then you want it back, then you get angry, then back to not believing it ect. I'm told that you (and I) will finally believe it, then you accept it, then move on.

Wow, I've had someone say that to me as well, and I had the same response as some others in that I have to see this person again. But then I thought about it, and in death the person that passes on was a great person when they were here and we remember them for what they WERE; the person we loved and respected. I think the same goes for divorce, except most of us hope we'll see that person again. We have to come to the reality that most likely, the person we knew and loved is gone. Hence, the death comparison. Still sux that we have to come face-to-face with whoever the hell snatched their body though!!

This is an issue I touched upon in my book because I believe that they are very similar. As a matter of fact, I think coping with death is, in a lot of ways, easier than coping with divorce or a break up.

One of my suggestions in this regard is that you consider conducting a relationship funeral. It might sound silly but it can prove to be an effective method of achieving that elusive sense of closure.

If you would like more details about how to go about it, please send me a message and I'd be happy to explain further.

all of these replies were very helpful, thank you.

Yeah....I completely know that feeling of being on the verge of just losing your mind. You do start to feel crazy. Everyone I've talked to has told me that this is very similar to a death, many have said that in some ways it's worse because you don't really have that closure. I don't know about that, because I've never lost someone really close to me, but I feel like someone died. I have gone in and out of every one of the stages of grief in no particular order. It's a horrible experience. Don't worry too much about "losing it", we ALL do. I "lost it" in the Walmart parking lot last week. I felt so dumb, but after talking to people....I realized that it's normal. We're okay...

It is like multiple deaths. It knocks you on your ass and then comes back every couple minutes to kick you. . After a while though the kicks get farther apart. It just is so miserable.

The length of time so long when it comes to healing. We all face the pain and deal with the hurt and try to find comfort where we can. You will get through this.

Thanks everyone. I just feel out of control, chest pain, shaking, crying, can't breath enough, so desperate to feel love. I feel so alone

Death you have closure is the only difference. you know the person moved onto hopefully a better place. divorce is different in that if children are present, you haev to see that person continually.
At some point in time, the healing process kicks in and you ACCEPT what's transpired. You also accept your own doing in how the relationship played out or ended. You move on, feel pity for the person you've left, then you can forgive and move on. Time is the ultimate healer. The first months are the toughest. Each day you think of them less and less and what was. You put the memories in a jar and close the lid. It gets better

One thing I learned when I joined here is that I was not alone as I thought. Find comfort in your family, friends and here.

Don't worry about losing it at work. I was in an auditorium of several hundred students testing and the person in charge said something only mildly harsh to me and I was a mess, tears rolling uncontrollably down my face and I could not stop!

In those early days I couldn't breathe, i felt like I was being electrocuted, my stomach was upset, head in a constant fog . . .

It is going to get better but know that there are going to be relapses. I am so sorry that you are going though this. It sucks, but there is light at the end of the tunnel!