Ok...so I cannot stand my x...he's horrible to my children and to me...but I love my kids and want them happy even if it means seeing the jerk. My DS12's 13th birthday is next month and I'm planning a HUGE party with his friends (he's been through HELL this year and deserves it). I have a dj booked to come and everything. Should I tell x about it and see if he wants to stop by? I hate that he's just abandoned his kids and wish that he'd take an active role in their life even if it's at least a small one. On one hand, I don't think x DESERVES to share in this moment...I'm paying for it and he hasn't offered to pay for or buy them a thing beyond CS since our separation...that's right folks, NO GIFTS..."I pay Child Support!" mentality even at Easter. On the other hand it's for my baby and he's hurt more than any of us by his dad's abandonment. Would it be totally selfish of me to not include x? Or should I simply leave it up to DS?
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