I have been crying mostly all day.. I want to go out but I can't make myself. I just sit here on the end of the coach where he used to sit. I hate this apartment. I still feel the absence of him here. I wish I could move. Everything is crowding up on me. I started thinking about my life and how I have lived in these crapy apartments for five years here in VA and I'm sick of living alone and missing my family in PA. I feel like I just haven't accomplished certain things that I have wanted too. Since I have moved down here I have been in three different relationships that have sucked all the emotional life out of me. I don't know what I have left. Today is one of those days where I feel like I just want to give up. I can't imagine him with someone else... I feel like I just want to go over to his house and cry in front of him and just tell him I want him back... I know I can't do that it's desperation. I just want all of this pain to go away.
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