I want to go out but it is hard to go out by yourself.

Ahh yes....one of those inevitable nights where I dwell miserably and think about how perfect his life is now while I struggle on a just about a daily basis. Thank goodness for DS so I remember that I am not nearly as alone as I feel. Hugs to all of you!!

stbx moved out to today. I couldn't be here for the finale. Yes I am having one of those days, but this is the grand daddy of one of those days. I feel horrible, devastated had desparate. I know it was coming.... but today here it is. And already he has called to as a favor. I just couldn't respond, told him that anything I heard from him had to be via email. I know he moved somewhere between 25 and 35 miles away, but I have no address, have no idea what he's doing, assuming divorcing me, be he hasn't said that unless he's really drunk. I just don't know...am I having one of those days? you bet, it's only 6:00 PM. and I've nearly killed off a bottle of wine, and I'm not really a drinker. :(

I slept all day.. just up.. I missed a fabulously sunny, warm bright day too... Im not feeling well.. and I think I am getting a bit depressed...hmmmm...

okay.. my point is. this is a NO SIGH ZONE... so. you are going to have to move along now and find something to do besides sigh... okay?.. go.. now get going!

I've been thinking about her today as well. I have been thinking about all the post and advice you guys gave me and I'm trying to get her off my mind. Looking at who and what she is now instead of what she was or what I want her to be. Today was rough for some reason but I can't let my life stop for one more second for someone who doesn't love me.

I going out on a date tonight and today I've been talking to my family and people that care about me.

Also signed up for some groups on meetup.com, but the groups have nothing to do with divorce, just my hobbies.

YEP- isnt that why were all HERE on our sat. night? we cld start our party, where we all meeting at???????????

Sigh. I'm with the kids. I did get out and get them shoes and winter coats. Now we are watching "Cars." I'm always with the kids. X only takes them for 3 hr stents between 1-6 one days off. So I can't go out to meet people. Dating is hard during that time frame. Not that I'm ready but one day. So I'm concerned on how to work things. I think about my husband but I don't miss all the neglect. It's not paining me that he's out a bars and restaurants meeting his next sex parter for the moment. Those memories won't last. Memories of spending time with my kids will. Now if I can just get my career pulled together I'll be in better shape!

and so it goes

yes. Sad, lonely, too much pain, doubting I can get over this.

Like zippid, I'm with the kids tonight. Unlike her, I'm not the custodial so I do get some time to myself; mostly time to bury myself into work or reading to try and either forget or cope with the loss of my family.

Having the kids on a night like tonight helps bring sanity to my life. I cherish these times.

I hate so many of the nights and weekends where I'm alone trying to rebuild who I am after being emotionally torn apart.

i guess my reasons for being home on a sat. are starting to have less to do with the breakup and more to do with there is nothing to do in this town anyway. and since im a smoker living in a smoke free state even going to the bar no longer has any appeal. im plenty happy to hang out at home and see whats up on the DS. it can be entertaining enough some nights :)

yup...every night.

yup *sigh*

Most all of the time.
If it weren't for you fine DS folks... Saturday nights would really be unbearable!

the avatars in this thread! very cool