
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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I want input on relationships during separation. In my state, you have to be separated a year to get a divorce. I started dating someone a few months into his separation. He told me he would never consider taking his wife back after she left him for someone else. However, now that the issues with dividing (or selling) property is hitting the fan, he's decided he needs to explore the idea of taking her back (if she is willing - she has not said she is willing). I do know that it is very difficult to give up things you love and that it's worth just about anything to avoid the pain that will bring. He told me the other night that he knows that it won't work, even if she does agree to come back - that everyone he has every known who did that only bought a few more months before it was definitely final. I can be patient and understanding, because this is the neatest guy I've ever known in my life. We have had such an emotional/verbal/intellectual connection and can talk for hours on the phone - something I have never had with anyone. I feel our relationship is great all around. But I don't know how to feel about this. Should I give it consider just giving up on him or should I be patient. Should I take this other guy I know up on his offers to go out and get on with my life or give him plenty of room and let him figure out what he needs to figure out (and I do recognize the validity of figuring it out)? I really don't know which will be the best course to take. Does anyone have experience with something like this and how did it turn out? Any and all advice is welcomed!
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But you know what? I don't love him. And there is no way on earth that I would ever take him back... even to save my home.
I feel like this... either you're over the ex, or you're not. If you are, there's no way you'd consider taking them back. So if this guy you're seeing is considering taking his ex back... I believe there's still something there. Why waste your time on a guy that still cares for someone else?
I hope..if he does go back..it is for the right reasons.
How he handles this situation..and how he treats his wife..might give you some important clues about him.
Dating someone so quickly after a separation is tricky business. It takes a good year or so to process all the stages of ending a marriage and it's not over 'til it's over. He is probably experiencing a lot of mixed emotions at this point. Hence the term, 'rebound relationship.' Good luck.
I have no intention of going back to my STBX, but I will say this, what other relationship I had did help to create some separation for me emotionally from STBX. It also showed me that not all guys are hooked on porn. I feel I got some value out of that.
However, I would warn you that it is a very touchy time in one's life and it is hard to say what the outcome would be or how stable things will be for you.
I think we are separated right now, not sure (long story). I would like to think that dating while you are even separated is cheating. Shouldn't you at least be definitely getting a divorce to start dating.
http://www.divorcerecovery101.com/kass1.html
I decided to not get too involved until I get my decree. Doesn't matter much, nobody's lining up taking numbers. LOL