Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Pls help. I need your prayers for me & my fami

deleted_user
deleted_user
I need help. I come from a very close, tight, immigrant family who believes in marital values and marriage for life and staying with your partner even during the bad times together. When my husband & I married, my family was so happy to the point that they wanted to and did spend their life's savings on a grandest wedding for their daughter (me) & their future son-in-law to see this day. 1 year later, my husband files for a divorce. He has hurt me, and now he is hurting my family. I want to work out things, but it's really hard when your significant other doesnt' want to meet you and doesn't want to communicate with you and does not even respect you as a person. I found out today that he still has not withdrawn the divorce action, but rather proceeded to place more notorious charges of cruelty. I know those charges are not true, but my spouse has his way with words and the legal system. My mother was crying. I tried to hug her and tell her that as a family we need to be strong and first thing is first, we need to fight for what's right. My mother kept crying and saying "why did he come into our family just to destroy us all and our happiness. I love you so much and worked hard all my life just so my kids could have all the happiness we didn't get to have. I can't even bear a scratch to you. It took a lifetime to create a home." I am so hurt right now. I keep wondering why God punishes innocent people and whether someday I will get justice. I have thoughts in my mind why did he do this? Does he have someone else in mind? What am I missing?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am so sorry, I have no answers for you, but I know it is so very damaging to families. I wish you the best.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh my dear.... you will never understand it. That realization is one of the hardest parts about it. What you do have to accept is that it is true, and that it isn't your fault. You have to repeat to yourself that you are worth more, and deserve better. You have to pick out from it what you can learn, and slough off what hinders you. I know it sounds like the hardest thing in the world to you right now, and I promise you, it gets better. Easier days are in your future. I'm sorry you are where you are now. *hugs*
deleted_user
deleted_user
how long did you know this guy before you married him? did you have a relationship where you could communicate, it seems not. if you did, perhaps you can get him to talk to you - i think htat if you asked the question about someone else, perhaps you already know?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Your poor parents :-( We sometimes forget that our parents get hurt by our stbx's too - wow. This breaks my heart. All I can say is don't let him do it to you! Don't let the hurt and grief overwhelm you to the point that you forget what wonderful people you are and that you don't deserve this. Take care of yourself and your parents. Good riddance!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am so sorry you and your family are hurting. I can't imagine that this is God's punishment. Sometimes there are no acceptable answers. We mothers often hurt more for our children than we do for ourselves. It is that love, along with the love of your family and your love for them that will sustain you all and see you thru this, along with a little help from your DS friends. (((Hugs)))
deleted_user
deleted_user
Stay strong and take care of yourself. You will get through this and so will your family.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Anju...the sad fact is that a marriage cannot be saved by only one;it requires the love and effort of both partners. I can see the pain that you and your family are experiencing because of his selfish and uncaring acts. I do not believe you are being punished by God, but from what you said, I do believe you are being wronged by your husband. Many of us wonder why our partners did the things they have done. Some of us will never truly know why.
deleted_user
deleted_user
angf- i actually didn't know him very long before we got married. But, we were so head over heels madly in love with each other that we couldn't wait to get married. Everyone is telling me that no guy is going to file a divorce and behave like this unless he has someone else in his life. I don't have any proof. He's been faithful the times I've been with him. I trust him. I love him.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am very sorry that he hurt you so much. My husband hurt me and my family as well. Who knows why they do the things they do. Let God handle this. Your "revenge" will come into play, and he will have to answer to what he did in the end. God will see you and your family through this. He's helped me tremendously, and continues to.

Praying for you and your family to have strength.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I too am so very sorry for you. You were right to rally your family and it sounds like you are supporting them as much as they will support you.

I understand your comment about innocent people. My daughter and I felt the same way. I cannot believe God is punishing us, even though it seems like it right now. Wondering why, will always be there, but probably not a question ever answered.

We are all here for you whenever you need support. I hope we can help you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Anju1, please know that God does not punish innocent people. We are living in the flesh right now, so we are in the secular realm and so we are vulnerable to the devil's work - pain, loss, and death. This is not the will of God. It IS the will of the devil. However, you can trust that it is God's will and his right to get revenge. Leviticus 19:18 "Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord." Please know that God will deal with him. But, it will be on God's time, not ours, not yours. Be patient - wait on the Lord, and you will see how He deals with your soon to be ex. What God has in store is worse than anything we could do.
deleted_user
deleted_user
This is not God's punishment on you.

We are all innately born with free will. We are free to choose what we do, to ourselves and to others.

No, life isn't fair sometimes. And people do horrible, cruel things to each other. But that is not a reflection of God.

As far as your stbx, it doesn't matter if he has someone else lined up or not, it honestly doesn't.

What does matter is you. Are you okay? Are you physically safe? Do you have some place you can go to get away from this?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am safe at home with my parents. I don't know how to fight against someone who does all these mean things to you, who has a family who thinks they are all "great" just because they are rich & well-off and my family is mediocre, and who's family has arms into the legal system, and who manipulates words. All I can say everything depends on just one person, the judge. Sometimes, even the judge can be even fooled as to who's more credible. I just don't understand God's plans. I don't understand how me and my family believe so much in God and have faith and believe in prayers are suffering so much... yet he, who states he believes in God, can proceed forward without an explanation, without a discussion, without even a face-to-face meeting with his wife?? You know, he told me he wanted a divorce over the phone.
deleted_user
deleted_user
He sounds like a heartless, arroagant bas**** = abuser. You will be happier without this in your life. I will be praying for you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I was told in am email, so I know how yuou feel, and he's a bastard for telling you over the phone. He wasn't man enough to say it to your face.
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