All I want to do is call him. I've been fighting with this. I'm trying no contact. I just want to hear his damn voice. I sit here all day and basically hold back tears until it's time to leave at 4:30. I just went in the bathroom and had a little cry. I can't let it all out because I can't LOOK like I've been crying. I seriously don't know how I'm going to get through this. Are there others out there that still want to be with their spouses so badly it's making them sick? Because that's the boat I'm in right now. I feel sick and pathetic and hurt and angry and betrayed. I feel like a fool because MY vows meant the entire world to me. Obviously, not him. I keep looking at our wedding pictures thinking... he looked so happy. I thought he was. How did I let this happen??? And where do I go from here?
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