My husband and I are divorcing. We were long distance and on and off for 4 years...mostly because he drank so I left. He got sober, I came back. Definition of insanity - doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. I even tried dating someone else but had nothing to give as he had/has my heart. I think something broke for him and he never trusted me fully again...even though we did marry - not even a year ago - during a good spree - sobriety, etc. Once married a lot of things happened that led to stress. The old dysfunction set back in. I guess enuf was enuf as he left the other day and we will divorce. Do I want it? No. Will I be better off? Perhaps. Does it matter...no, it is happening and I can't stop it. I must be addicted as my body is cold, I can't sleep, I shake...withdrawals. I can't picture like without him. Life with him and all it's problems seem better than a future without him. I don't know what to do. I understand how depression got coined as I feel someone is pushing down on me making it hard to even want t get up. I have to see the real picture and stop romanticizing or I won't get better and on with my life.
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