i am so sorry to hear about this.. how to you feel about the marraige was this coming for a long time or was it sudden look iside your soul and you will find the answers i can feel you hurt as i watched my husband move out too. painfull stuff i am here if you need to vent talk or whatever
God Bless

Some times time apart is beneficial. Take time to think about what you can change, what you can do differently for YOURSELF to make you happy. We need to take time to figure this out, we can\'t be interesting to someone else if we aren\'t strengthening and improving ourselves.

Put your life on hold as long as you need to- in order to make it work out...

I wish you all the best!

Signe is absolutely right. You should work on making yourself the best person you can for YOU and then maybe, just maybe, things will improve in your marriage. You don\'t need to put your life on hold, do exactly the opposite...move on. That doesn\'t mean dating of course, or running to a lawyer, but make your own decisions and don\'t act as if you are part of a \"we.\" Best of luck- it will all make sense soon enough.

Thanks for your support. We are still talking every day and will probably go out for dinner on New Years. If that didn\'t happen I had two other choices. One was going to my nieces for a party and the other was going to a party where my friends band was playing. I was going to choose the first because I know I would be mad if my wife chose going to a New Years dance party with out me. I know I\'m going to have to get over that but it makes me sick to think about her being with someone else.

Here is an update. My wife and I went out for dinner last night and then went back to her apartment. What did I find there and boquet of roses from her \"friend\". I also found out they have discussed meeting. This guy lives 6 hours away and she is willing to drive 3 hours to meet him for lunch. She says they have exchanged photos. I am just sick. We decided last night that we would not talk unless she calls. I hate life right now...

I really don\'t know what to say... except that I know how you feel. Even after over a year it still feels like crap when I think of my ex-spouse with another woman. The best I can do is try not to go there in my thoughts... but that can be difficult to do. Hang in there...

Several things to consider.

1) your wife abandon you and your son. You still need to hold her financial responsible for the care and welfare of your son.

2) she made the \"poor\" choice not you.

3) You can not change her - do not beg, plead or even try to guilt trip her to return. It must be of her own free will or it will not last.

4) Take care of you - get yourself in order. I call it the ducks syndrome. get your 5 ducks in a row --- physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and financially.

5) Seek out your support groups - family and friends that you can turn to... and take them up on their offers of help.

Great advice! I am back to work today and feeling better. My daughters are back from school for a couple of weeks and my son is moving in. I still dread the weekends but I will just have to get motivated to keep my self busy. The next two weeks will be great then I have to go through the separation again when my daughters go back to school.

I am so sorry for your pain, 25years. As a woman who instigated the divorce from my man after 25 years of marriage, I can tell you that it is incredibly painful on this side, too.

Everyone\'s story is different, so I do not attempt to side with one or the other. But I would recommend that you follow the suggestions of others and take the time to get to know yourself a little better, and see what you can make of your life without her. Don\'t waste time trying to win her back -- if you do well enough on your own, it may influence her to try with you again. But if it doesn\'t, at least you will be making the most of your life.