
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
it will be hard this time of year, but I am sure in the long run it will be better.
Sorry this happened so quick and he is apt to just leave.
You did the right thing though, don't second-guess yourself or try to rationalize his BS.
Make sure you utilize your support network. DS can be a part of that, but if there's people you can talk to in person, that helps out a lot as well.
The pain will go away eventually. I know, it'd be nice if it went away now.
But it will go away.
Trust me on this one.
He had the nerve to tell me he was sorry I found out this way. After 8 months of lying to my face.
things will get better all in due time. i am sure you don't want to play second fiddle. i'm very proud of you for taking a stand. the hard part is over, now on to the healing :)
i hope you find the strength and support that you need. i will be thinking of you...
That was very helpful for me and my friends called me all the time to make sure I was okay which helped tremendously.
I'm so sorry you have to endure this. The pain and bitterness and resentment is HUGE! NO wonder people have gone postal in these situations. I had to eat humble pie and pray and ask everybody for help but it brough me relief quicker. We are here for you. This is not your FAULT. His decision is NO YOUR FAULT. He's the quitter not you.
Please go see a lawyer and find your rights out, since the following seems to be the case:
(1) husband moving out and in with other woman
(2) abandoning marital house
(3) change the locks on the house, do not forget about the garage, and if you have to reprogram the garage door opener
(4) today, if not tomorrow, write down every single account the two of you have togeter, assets, including property, life insurance policies, including account numbers. Consider this putting a freeze on all your accounts including savings and checking.
(5) You are going to need a GREAT lawyer that is going to draft a GREAT separation document which should include who is going to pay all the bills, including your mortgage if you have one and should include that if you are on your husband's medical and medical plan, that you have to remain on there, until (if a divorce should happen)
(6) Start keeping a journal of all of this. Document today for example the time and day that he moved out. This way if you need to refer back to it, your journal already has that information there handy.
(7) Make an appointment with your gyn (sorry this is not meant to hurt you) and have him/her do a full physical exam and run a blood test for STDs across the board. At this point, you have to protect yourself, and the only way to do that is to face the situation. When you are at the GYN, ask for a mild sleeping sedative, that way if you aren't sleeping, you already have this taken care of.
(8) Its easy in crisis or divorce situations to turn to other things, such as alcohol, pain pills to console ourselves. You are at the right place here on DS.
(9) You are a good lady and did not deserve this. Sure it takes two people in a marriage to cause problems, but in the long run, it takes only one person to end it and in a very painful way.
(10) Seeing a counselor, or pastor, someone specializing in divorce and marriage counselling would really help.
(11) Keep your head high. Don't despair. I was there nearly a year ago, and its nearly the one year mark for me on December 29th.
We are all here for you, and want to see you come out of this a while person. I am sorry that this is happening. Please remember these are his choices, and he is going to have to own those choices.
But I know you are in pain right now, and although it doesn't help - I will repeat what everyone else is saying - time, time and more time. Watch chick flicks, cry a lot - keep a journal about why he's a jerk and remember, above all, that you are a valuable loveable person. You deserve better!!!