I am sorry for what you have to go through. It is going to be painful, gather friends and support around you. You will find a lot of that on here.

i'm sorry for your pain right now, especially at this time of year. be strong and in time, you will find happiness again.

I am glad you were able to find out and at least try to confront her and him.

it will be hard this time of year, but I am sure in the long run it will be better.

Sorry this happened so quick and he is apt to just leave.

It hurts, and it's going to hurt for a bit.

You did the right thing though, don't second-guess yourself or try to rationalize his BS.

Make sure you utilize your support network. DS can be a part of that, but if there's people you can talk to in person, that helps out a lot as well.

The pain will go away eventually. I know, it'd be nice if it went away now.

But it will go away.
Trust me on this one.

He says he's leaving to make it easier on me.
He had the nerve to tell me he was sorry I found out this way. After 8 months of lying to my face.

been right where you are now, bout 6 months ago. i thought life would be over. now? shoot, i thank her everyday!

things will get better all in due time. i am sure you don't want to play second fiddle. i'm very proud of you for taking a stand. the hard part is over, now on to the healing :)

i hope you find the strength and support that you need. i will be thinking of you...

I am so sorry to read this. It is going to be painful for a long time and it will come up at the most unexpected times. But believe me things will get better over time. Give yourself time. There is no timetable to healing. Take care of yourself as best you can. CRY, SCREAM, SMILE, LAUGH and everything in between. You can get through this even though it literally feels like your heart is being ripped from your body.

The pain is very bad but it does get better! We have been there and we know how it feels like it will never end, but hang in there, better days are ahead!

I am glad he is moving out so quickly. Trust me it will help the healing process to have them out of the house. You need to go find a close friend and get it out of you. You need to talk about it, cry about it and even yell. It will make it easier trust me. This sight is VERY helpful, but you also need your friends there that can lend you a shoulder. I will be thinking about you. She is a coward for hanging up on you! Although remember no matter what you need to be angry at him NOT her. If it wasn't her it would have been someone else anyway. Stay strong!

Don't isolate yourself. Get out and do things when you can.
That was very helpful for me and my friends called me all the time to make sure I was okay which helped tremendously.

I would have perfered your situation to mine. Mine cheated with more than one, did porn, became addicted. Set me up with a painful reveal so I would kick him out and file. Now he tells his friends and mother that I'm the villian and he just doesn't understand what's wrong with me. Nobody knows about his nasty habit or his girlfriend. It just kills me I have to wear the villian hat when I'm the victim. I can only hope that in time the tides will change and his true colors will be seen. Hopefully by then I'll be happy and independent of all this crap.

I'm so sorry you have to endure this. The pain and bitterness and resentment is HUGE! NO wonder people have gone postal in these situations. I had to eat humble pie and pray and ask everybody for help but it brough me relief quicker. We are here for you. This is not your FAULT. His decision is NO YOUR FAULT. He's the quitter not you.

I see the situation from a different object.

Please go see a lawyer and find your rights out, since the following seems to be the case:

(1) husband moving out and in with other woman
(2) abandoning marital house
(3) change the locks on the house, do not forget about the garage, and if you have to reprogram the garage door opener
(4) today, if not tomorrow, write down every single account the two of you have togeter, assets, including property, life insurance policies, including account numbers. Consider this putting a freeze on all your accounts including savings and checking.
(5) You are going to need a GREAT lawyer that is going to draft a GREAT separation document which should include who is going to pay all the bills, including your mortgage if you have one and should include that if you are on your husband's medical and medical plan, that you have to remain on there, until (if a divorce should happen)
(6) Start keeping a journal of all of this. Document today for example the time and day that he moved out. This way if you need to refer back to it, your journal already has that information there handy.
(7) Make an appointment with your gyn (sorry this is not meant to hurt you) and have him/her do a full physical exam and run a blood test for STDs across the board. At this point, you have to protect yourself, and the only way to do that is to face the situation. When you are at the GYN, ask for a mild sleeping sedative, that way if you aren't sleeping, you already have this taken care of.
(8) Its easy in crisis or divorce situations to turn to other things, such as alcohol, pain pills to console ourselves. You are at the right place here on DS.
(9) You are a good lady and did not deserve this. Sure it takes two people in a marriage to cause problems, but in the long run, it takes only one person to end it and in a very painful way.
(10) Seeing a counselor, or pastor, someone specializing in divorce and marriage counselling would really help.
(11) Keep your head high. Don't despair. I was there nearly a year ago, and its nearly the one year mark for me on December 29th.

We are all here for you, and want to see you come out of this a while person. I am sorry that this is happening. Please remember these are his choices, and he is going to have to own those choices.

Yes you are lucky he is moving out without a fight- I had to get a court order and it was 3 months of living with him in stress and tension! You'll go through that "worthless- what's wrong with ME" feelings, but trust me it isn't anything she has over you, it's his sickness- his bad choices to put his efforts away from home and not have his priorities on you. Men have a whol seperate heart and brain that lives in their penis!

God bless you honey sorry to hear that and I know the pain is hard hang in there..

My stbex husband and I have to live in the same house and work our co-owned business together. Hell, I would pay him to have him pack and move out.

But I know you are in pain right now, and although it doesn't help - I will repeat what everyone else is saying - time, time and more time. Watch chick flicks, cry a lot - keep a journal about why he's a jerk and remember, above all, that you are a valuable loveable person. You deserve better!!!