Friendship is a big part of marriage. And yes, I do believe that when the marriage ends this friendship ends as well. Some people are able to maintain a more casual type of friendship after the divorce, softentimes because there are children involved.

I'm trying the friendship after divorce thing right now. It's going to be REALLY tough but I'm trying to be cool about it. The worst part is when she has me meet the boyfriend that she was cheating on me with--that's coming soon. Torture?

Never really thought about it.

I thought HE was a friend actually.

Recently we were discussing something about the children.. I was giving him the heads up on their emotional state and how he should perhaps approach a situation that might arise.

I prefaced the topic by stating to him that I was NOT his Friend, nor did I want to be his Friend. This was not friendly advice to help him out and help him gain points, but information to benefit the children and help them deal with a emotional situation.

I was surprise that I told him He was not my Friend. I have no idea why I blurted it out. Some pent up emotion no doubt.

I don't think so in most cases. I think it is just an advanced way to torture yourself.

Mine was my best friend and I didn't care to have any other best friends. I was satisfied with my one best friend in him. It is so hard to salvage a friendship from a break up. Maybe after time & healing has gone by. But at that point who needs them anyway.

I think that a lot of it depends on how and why the marriage ended.

It has to be over completely

If you could be friends you would not be divorcing. Face the facts "friends" do not hurt friends

My ex tells me that he wants us to still be friends and he wants us to be best friends. Well, if that is the case, then why won't he work on the marriage with me? I think that if we are going to be friends again, it is going to be a really long time before I feel comfortable. When I want more than a friendship, it is hard to just have a friendship. I want more. Not a very good friendship.

Depends I guess on your definition of friendship. If somebody hurt you they are not a friend.

It includes friendship, but it's more. I still have "feelings of friendship" toward mine; we were friends before we fell in. But dunno about friends after the meat cleaver to the heart bits.

I think it is a overrated line, kinda like

"call me sometime"

"I am fine"

" i don't mean to hurt you, that was never my intent"


maybe in time but I think it is more akin to " be civil" towards one another.. rather than friendship

Have to agree with Cherub on this one. In the same vane as, I love you but I am not in love with you. You either have to have a very pleasant divorce or a great relationship to be friends with some one who treats you like last weeks trash, or worse.

I learned that she never really was my friend. Friends have at least the common decency to have a very basic respect for one another as struggling humans. She did not.
That has been sadder than the demise of the marriage.

I am very close to my children's father, who I was married to as a teenager and then for nine years. BUT, it took 17 years for us to go from formerly married to friends. I now consider him and his wife two of my closest friends, and I really don't know what I'd do without them. They are like a brother and sister. But, like I said, it took 17 years to get to that point, and during those years, we were civil at best and I would describe the relationships then as strained.

I don't think the average person can be friends with their ex right out of the divorce gate. It takes a lot of time and healing and growth to get to a point where you can make peace with the past and build a new relationship.

My stbx and I have this frienship that we share. Like everyone else has asked, why are we divorcing then? Friendship is a huge part of being married.