wow thats going to be tough. no chance of living closer? your children are so very young also. i'm sorry, i have nothing to offer. good luck.

I think more frequent shorter visits are better for children that age. Maybe a two week visit Every three months. Once they start school it will be harder, but by then you should feel more comfortable letting them go for longer bc you can talk to them on the phone and actually make sure everything is OK and not feel like you are missing too much.

Yes, it's really tough. It tears my heart so much. I left the state where had lived for almost a year with my then a year and a half daughter. I was also pregnant 5 months pregnant and that time with our second one. I was done with all the abuse, and the last straw,was- to make a tme in front of our daughter. Anyway, I left for a shelter, and they help me get protective orders, then the shelter helped me get to where my family is at, here in California. Anway, so even when I moved to California, our daughter's jurisdiction would be in that state where I just left (Colorado). And it's crazy in Colorado, because even if there is domestic violence and drug use ( I also found out he was using drugs) they still give 50-50 custody. Please, if you guys have any suggestions, or ideas let me know. Thank you.

Can't really say what a schedule might be, but I do know that webcams can really help bridge long distances between parents and kids. Just one tiny little tool, I know, for a very tuff problem.

ooops. seems like I can't type. "I was done with all the abuse, and the last straw,was- when he used his gun on my in front of our daughter." When I begged him not to do this in front of her, he grabbed her and threw her onto a room on the bed and turned off the lights on her. I could still hear her crying "Mommy Mommy!!!" But he didn't care. He kept on beating me up and banging me on the wall. He didn't even care about our baby. So I had to leave. I can't have my daughter grow up to witness this anymore, just to end up in an abusive relationship. She deserves so much more. This gotta stop. But even with the abuse, the judge in Colorado wants 50-50. If you guys have any suggestions for a reasonable parenting time, please let me know. I am still praying that our children will stay with me majority of the time, but I still want them to have a good relationship with their dad. Please if you have any suggestions, I would greatly appreciate it.

I thought of living closer, maybe choosing a state in between both of us. But I dunno, all my supports are here in California, and I can't go back to Co. because he basically knows all the people there, and the people he does drugs with are there. And yeah, lots of bad memories.

For now, my ex husband gets JT once a month, the second weekend. No holidays. But, it could all change when he turns 3, not sure what yet, but wanting more so then anything supervised visits.