Consider yourself lucky if he's just cheating with scruffy ass women...mine was involved with "men" that he picked up in gay bars!

Well i can't help with the answer because after 21 years mine has done the same to me and mine. If anyone gets the answer i would love to hear it.

Sorry, but thats a two way street. This describes my stbx wife to a T.

I would like to know the answer too. My stbx moved in with her and her mother, he claims she is a nurse. She is the only nurse I know that is home majority of the time lol.

Hi coolhands well yes it do go both ways you do have some women like that to, But I've seen mostly man! Cindy

Have to agree with coolhand on this one woman are just as guilty as men running off with losers.

Hi
you pretty much have said what I have gone through. I don't have the answer as to why they leave all I can say is that when you don't love yourself and have a lot of issues you tend to look for comfort somewhere else. Might not be the right answer, but we will never know.

Insecurity....? Maybe they are so insecure they have to get a second opinion, or third, or fourth;;;;etc.

Because they think variety is the spice of life, little do they know it's the downfall- untill it hits their pocket- my husband apparently has no heart anymore unless it's in his pocket! Hope the OW makes good money cuz he owes me for 20 long years - 10 full of his emotional abuse!

Why do women dump nice guys and marry men that are abusive, neglectful, inconsiderate and selfish. Then give them children and wonder why they havent changed into better men?

I think men get alot of bad press for the choices we make in treating good women badly.

I don't think women get as much exposure on their decisions to stay with losers, and try REALLY hard to keep a relationship with these losers
(aka bad boys, emotionally unavailable,ect), while it's easy for them to lose interest in a man that cooks, cleans, listens,comes home every night. This sight has tons of men that did more right then they did wrong and they were tossed aside.

It's funny that we have all these wonderful people to talk to and share our experiences with BUT the people we spend the most time and energy talking about are the men that are abusive, neglectful, inconsiderate and selfish losers
(aka bad boys, emotionally unavailable,ect).

Anyone see a pattern between what we think about and what we get?

My stbx wanted to give me sex more often than I wanted it from her because she wasn't interested in spicy it up a little. I don't know if this is the issue, but my point is that people cheat because something isn't being fulfilled (not just sexually). Don't try to make sense out of it; focus on healing yourself and making yourself stronger!

stpcfrlc: you mostly notice men because you're mostly looking at men. women cheat just as much. it's silly to make this an issue of sex.

very true Nico510!!!! It's always easier for the people to notice negative behavior in the opposite sex than it is for them to notice it in their own gender.

If possible I wold like to hear some of the ladies POV. This post was for them.

What you are looking at is someone with no hope of ever finding happiness. He has no idea what that is. My stbx is the same way. It is really sad to think that there is never a happy ending for some people.

Here is my answer. The person who leaves decides to quit trying, quit communicating their needs, quit taking responsibility for their committments and quits respecting their spouses. ITS ALL A CHOICE!!!
With the exception of relatioships that involve abuse. I'm wondering/thinking they just QUIT!