It\'s been 4 months since he took off and it\'s still all I ever think about. I wake up thinking about it and go to bed thinking about it. It even wakes me up in the morning or in the middle of the night. On top of that I have so many other problems i\'m trying to deal with and it\'s just getting to be too much. I have one friend and she\'s married so it\'s not the best of circumstances b/c if I hang out with her I have to hang out with him too. Not only that but seeing those two flirt with each other, show affection, and exchange sweet comments is the last thing I need. It\'s horrible. Why have I gotten my heartbroken plenty of times before but this one\'s literally killing me. I can\'t do this anymore. I just want to forget about it and move on but I can\'t. And I know I won\'t be forget about it until I fall in love again but I don\'t see that happening either. I am extremely picky w/guys (because I have problems) and if theres something about them I don\'t like I can\'t deal with them. I always get these wonderful guys and then they take off on me b/c i\'m too depressed. No body wants me. I was depressed before he left me but now i\'ve reached rock bottom. I feel so worthless, so unloved, so thrown away. No disrespect to anyone\'s faith but I have completely lost my faith in God. I don\'t think anyone is really there now. I\'m hurting so bad. It\'s starting to get physical now. And someone older than me told me life only gets worse. He\'s right. Why do I suffer so much? Why have I been unhappy since I can remember? I have no one to really talk to anymore and my meds aren\'t working for the third time. The third relationship to fail, the third prescription to fail. Third times a charm I guess.
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