Just got back a bit ago from the hearing and I am a wreck. This is such a sad day. I took the rest of the day off from work. I feel so depressed. We did not even speak to each other. When the judge gave her final ruling it was like a dagger in my heart. I never wanted things to end this way. This has been such a traumatic experience. She never once contacted me to see how I was. Now I bet she is happy to have gotten what she wanted, and I came out of this feeling worthless, and feeling like a horrible person. I wish she could feel the pain I am in. I was strong and did not show weakness. Once it was over I just walked out and did not look back. I do not cry much but today I am. It is such a sad thing. You guys are my only support here as I live alone in this city. I do not know how long it will take to get over this. My friends back home do not understand what I am going through. THIS IS SOO HARD!
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