your taking it a lot better than i did. when my stbx cheated i could barely stand to look at her let alone talk to her for a very long time. i hope things get better for you.

What a crock of shit of a statement!

That really pisses me off. She made it too easy for him and so he kept cheating?

She didn't make him do anything! He chose to cheat and keep cheating...It was his choice, he most likely pursued her...lied to her as he lied to you.

Kick his ass to the curb right now. Until he takes responsibility for his actions I would never consider taking him back.

He's blaming her? You did make the right decision.

Thanks for your responses. It's nice to have some confirmation from total strangers. Sharing this sort of stuff with family and friends tends to get tied with their anger about the whole thing. Right now I can't worry about that.

I am taking things better because it took me only one year to figure out I am just wasting my time on more of the same.

That certainly was a "crock of shit of a statement" but it said a lot about what sort of a person he is and I have to be realistic about our relationship. He is emotionally younger that his shoe size lol.

The fact that he blames her also scares me because I wondered about what he blamed me for in the marriage?

Once I got over my hurt I wanted to learn from my mistake and keeping things amicable is the best thing right now because I can get his input to learn from my mistake.

So far I have learned that I need to put more inquiry into my future relationships than I do by new shoes!!!!!

I agree with aguy. What she forced him? She unzipped him and then stuck it in herself. Give me a break. What an asshole

I think it says a lot about you that you can still be friendly with him. It doesn't sound like you're considering going back and you're right, he's emotionally immature for not taking responsibility for his actions (sounds familiar). As long as seeing him doesn't hurt you or make you obsess over the past, I don't see why you shouldn'nt (as friends). But as soon as you feel like he's getting in the way of you starting your own life, I would cut him loose.

Your stbx needs to take the blame instead of degrading the other person. Just shows that he is not owning up! Don't let him fool you!

I'm glad this post is here. I can totally see my ex at some point in the future using a lame ole excuse like "he made it too easy to cheat." nmever ever taking the blame on anything. cheaters never, ever do blame themselves. its' always your fault or the other persons. never themselves.

I have to agree with people here. No one held a gun to his head while he was with her. I think you made the right choice!

Just because she made it easy didn't mean it was OK for him to just dive in. Just like my EX, his whore said to him, "I have never cheated on my husband before, but I would with you." He took it as a green light to just go, regardless of what a ripple effect it would have on everyone else. So because of his stupidity and her being so "easy", has disrupted more lives than he will ever realize.

What a crock of shit. He is just making excuses for himself. It takes two. If he done if before he will do it again. You will never be able to trust him again. It will get easier. Just stay away from him.

my God there's an excuse for everything isnt there? Good for you for sticking to your guns and getting rid of that...

Nothing more evil than someone who wont' take accountability for their actions. I'd say...leave him as fast as humanly possible!!

You got something some of us never got;

He admitted he had an affiar.

That's not exactly something to be extremely happy about. But for some of us, all we had was a gut feeling, that something was off or just wasn't right. ANd no matter how much proof we had, it was nothing but denial from the other person.

Feeling like something is ery, ery wrong but not having it validated by the other person admitting it can be...maddening.

But he actually fessed up.

That's worth more than words can say.

"Made it easy"??
After my divorce I found out that my wife (now ex) had cheated. Her excuse was that she just wasnt "happy" anymore. Always, and I mean always..someone elses fault!! She will have to live with the fact that our kids now look at her completely different, whats left of her friends look at her different. Mmmm I guess the grass isnt always greener.