I know what you mean. It is so reassuring to have input and insight from as many people as possible.

i so agree with you. i wrote a great post yesterday, by melony beatty so appropriate for this site. and it's gone off the the dump pile, yet we respond in negative to someone else venting, ok, so his language was offensive to some. and then there are other posts where someone is really hurting and they go unnoticed. this saying from alanon fits here for me. take what you want and leave the rest. so i read and take the support and encouragement and leave the rest. and i hope that i give in return.

very true. I read the post and felt it did not need a response. I was shocked at how many people replied.

In the future If he ever posted a comment that was sincere in asking for help I would reply if I had advice or support to give.

That particular posting was offensive to men and women alike. I did not want to give it any energy.

I'm not trying to judge him, we are all here because we are in pain and "fighting some battle". I think that post like that do more harm than good.

We all suffer in pain and we all get consumed by anger. But to lash out in a way that is no better then what was done to us. Emotions are very raw and decisons and actions made off them are damaging. I understand anger that comes from pain. Venting can help but to do it in a form that is benefical for oneself instead of posting it for others to see. Granted there are things I wish I have never said outside of myself. It is tough for all of us.

IMHO,

I responded because I felt this type of entry should be journaled rather than made public because it was so offensive and stated as such.

Now, having said that, I may not have anything valueable to say to someone in need, or may not be able to relate as my situation could be totally differant, therefore don't respond. The other thing is many posts get wonderful responses and I don't feel the need to say the same thing others have said before me. No point in repeats after all.

Secondly, I feel many of these discussions are more appropriately served as journal entries rather than public discussions. I am past that hurting stage and to respond to each and every "HURTING" post, brings me right back down and I worked very hard to get myself out of that position.

So, having said that, while I appreciate your opinion on the subject, there is always more than one way to look at any given topic.

I will agree to disagree and move on.

I agree with aguy. I don't reply to a lot of the topics because I don't have anything new to add. There are only so many ways to say it will get better.

Maybe not all topics are appropriate for everyone but I am really tired of people starting threads to tell someone else that their feelings should not be expressed in a discussion. Free speech people! If you don't like it walk away and forget about it.

And that is mho. Feel fee to disagree!

Aguy you pretty much hit the nail on the head. We are here to support one another. Up until a few weeks ago you couldn't get me to shut up. We are all here in different levels. I love using the pain I've gone through to help others. After being here a while there seems to be nothing new I can add sometimes. Other who are using their pain to help others only say the same things I would say. Honestly, I feel I can only say the same thing but so many times. Lately, i am here to see how you guys are. It is hard to go through the repeditiveness of someone always being under the cloud of gloom and doom. Just when I feel I've given the best advice I have there are 10 more posts of others feeling the same way.

Some of you have such fresh pain that i can only get but so caught up in it without allowing myself fall back into old pain. Almost everything I can say I've already said a million times before. I give what I can and I let you guys know that we are here for you. Some threads get lots of responses and some don't that life here. The thread with the ugly language got a bigger reaction from me and got my blood boiling because we all have suffered enough disrespect in our lives...we shouldn't have to go through it here in a space reserved for support.

Personally, I can't write unless something compells me to.
I'f I'm reading someone's post, and other people pretty much have it covered, then I feel like I'm just repeating what's already been said.
Sometimes, when people ask for help when it comes to children, I honestly don't feel like I have any place in adding any advice since I don't have any children of my own, and it wouldn't feel responsible to add in my two cents on something I know nothing about. I can try to be supportive...

Then there are threads to absolutely, positively need to be addressed. From people hurting and asking for help (I try if I can), to people who are crying out for help in more ways than they realize (The Wife post for example).

As far as having something you feel adds to the community and it gets pushed down bellow where people can immediately see it...if it means that much to you, bump it back up. Takes maybe 5 seconds to do that.

I realize that this is a large community, and that there is no way we could ever come to a consensus on pretty much anything with the way this place is set up. For the most part, we rely on people to be courteous, polite and hopefully thoughtful on their own. There's really no way to "police" things unless people are vocal about their disdain for something by posting or replying to a post, much the way a free society should be.