Just when I think I am progressing, the fucktard strikes again. I don't know why I have such strong feelings for someone who is so much of an ass. We were talking last night and have been getting along great, then the reality sets in, he was going to Canada to visit OW. Mind you, he was not going to tell the kids, he picks them up from school. He told them yesterday tha he would see them after school today, but when we talked this morning and I asked if he was picking them up, he said, "Probably not." Well, that's because he is already in Canada. I lost it. I let him see me so weak. I started crying and yelling. I feel so ashamed for the way I behaved and it just gives him more fuel. He didn't want to talk because he was with her. He just said I was nuts and that I am acting crazy. Yes, I am, but he has no clue what this is really about. How can you just walk away and say you are a good father and you love your kids, but I know that is not the truth. I am just hurting so bad and don't know how to get out of this funk.
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