
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
I am a 47 year old man who lives in Virginia. I left California 5 years algo to marry my first wife. She has asked for a divorce. Really for no reason that is vaild. I have worked hard on our marriage, been fiathfull and 100% committed. The only thing I failed her at is not loosing weight that she wanted me to. She has fallen into the chat room addiction and even has amitted to slepping with a man on a chat room party that was in Las Vegas. Even with this hurt I love her and want her to come back and make things work. I know she won't. Today I just hurt real bad. I don't know why because it's been almost 2 weeks since she asked for the divorce. I heard this song called "Good Bye My Lover" By James Blunt. I keep playing it over and over and cannot hold back the tears. The words are so true... Will this hurt ever pass?
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You are in my prayers.
Tim
If yo want to lose the weight do it for yourself. She may not appreciate it
come explain why he shouldn't play that over and over!!
Then there's the fact that all you're doing is perpetuating the pain by listening to it over and over again.
I know when we're in pain (especially the emotional kind) we tend to hone in on music that reflects how we feel. But this can be self-defeating sometimes.
The pain will pass, but you have to give it time. Sorry, but that's the only cure for it. Distance between you and what's causing you this pain is the only way you will get any relief.
I know you still care about this woman, but you deserve better than that, especially from someone who claimed to care about you but let something superficial get in the way of her remaining faithful to you. It's a pretty pathetic excuse for straying from her vows to you.
You sound like a great guy and it sounds like she's got issues. Personally I like James Blunt, but he's probably not good for you right now. Perhaps you should put on some William Shatner....you'll still be crying but it will be a different kind of tears. *smile* I feel your pain and hugs to you!
In your case, it sounds like you were roughly the same weight when you and she first got together, and it wasn't an issue then.
I wish I had some great advice to give you, but there is no easy answer. I will say that I learned from painful experience that begging and pleading does NOT work. If anything it makes things worse, because then they lose respect for you.
Try to concentrate on yourself and what YOU want to do with your life. After you get a little more distance from the situation, you may begin to realize that you're better off without her.
Hang in there, and just know that you're not alone in this.