
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
Thinking how I can put a very long story into a short one...
After a 22 year marriage my husband and I divorced.I call it midlife crisis. New woman and new motorcycle...
We are still good friends.
I received a 100.000 settlement for my part of our home which was paid off.
I met Tom a few months after the divorce and we married the next year.
I did get a prenup before marriage, even thou this was the sweetest man I'd ever met.
Little did I know that soon...verbal, mental and physical abuse would start.
He was diagnosed as being bipolar with personality disorders,after first going thru chronic depression after both his parents died shortly after we married.
I stayed with this man thru all the abuse because he was seeking help and meds to get better.
He has worked little during the 3 years we have been married, just enough to keep his medical ins in effect thru his company. Last year he almost had a heart attack and ended up with 3 stents placed in his chest and on 7-8 different medications.
Now we were informed that he no longer has no ins.
I have wanted a divorce for months having given up on him getting stable with his mental issues.
I cant take the abuse anymore.
This wasn't new to him ,he has known for months I am done and was preparing to sell the house. Which WE bought right before we were married with ME putting my 100,000 down on the house. He put nothing.But the prepup states that if we divorced before 5 years this money would come back to me in the sell of the house.
Since I have told him, I am filing for divorce this spring (after finishing a rec room this winter first) AND he found out he has no medical ins. he stated to me "fine...file for divorce..the day I get the served I will immediately go to the ER.
Tell them I am having chest pains and all the equity that is in this house will be gone " We already know when they did the stents there were more that needed done, but they chose not to do them at that time....
I thought he cant do this and ask my ins agent where I get my medical ins, Would they take my home over medical bills. And he said sadly they can. AND I couldn't file for bankruptcy because there is so much equity in the house.He is uninsurable...I've been denied by everywhere I applied ...Help...
I feel so used....blackmailed by someone I loved and did everything to try to help and work thru everything else.
I just feel beaten down....with no way out of this
I'm sorry this is so long
Thanks for reading
Debbi
After a 22 year marriage my husband and I divorced.I call it midlife crisis. New woman and new motorcycle...
We are still good friends.
I received a 100.000 settlement for my part of our home which was paid off.
I met Tom a few months after the divorce and we married the next year.
I did get a prenup before marriage, even thou this was the sweetest man I'd ever met.
Little did I know that soon...verbal, mental and physical abuse would start.
He was diagnosed as being bipolar with personality disorders,after first going thru chronic depression after both his parents died shortly after we married.
I stayed with this man thru all the abuse because he was seeking help and meds to get better.
He has worked little during the 3 years we have been married, just enough to keep his medical ins in effect thru his company. Last year he almost had a heart attack and ended up with 3 stents placed in his chest and on 7-8 different medications.
Now we were informed that he no longer has no ins.
I have wanted a divorce for months having given up on him getting stable with his mental issues.
I cant take the abuse anymore.
This wasn't new to him ,he has known for months I am done and was preparing to sell the house. Which WE bought right before we were married with ME putting my 100,000 down on the house. He put nothing.But the prepup states that if we divorced before 5 years this money would come back to me in the sell of the house.
Since I have told him, I am filing for divorce this spring (after finishing a rec room this winter first) AND he found out he has no medical ins. he stated to me "fine...file for divorce..the day I get the served I will immediately go to the ER.
Tell them I am having chest pains and all the equity that is in this house will be gone " We already know when they did the stents there were more that needed done, but they chose not to do them at that time....
I thought he cant do this and ask my ins agent where I get my medical ins, Would they take my home over medical bills. And he said sadly they can. AND I couldn't file for bankruptcy because there is so much equity in the house.He is uninsurable...I've been denied by everywhere I applied ...Help...
I feel so used....blackmailed by someone I loved and did everything to try to help and work thru everything else.
I just feel beaten down....with no way out of this
I'm sorry this is so long
Thanks for reading
Debbi
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Both our names on the deed...
He said we can try...but if he makes good on his threat little you can do.And if I try and lose...then I'll have nothing ..atleast I do have my home now. I try to stay strong.But its a horrible way to have to live.
Thanks for the hugs and ...well just being out there
Debbi
Talk to an attorney.
What does he think they will do if he goes to the ER and says that he is having chest pains..open heart surgery??
They will do an EKG..take some blood, run some labs. They will see very quickly that he is okay. Kind of hard to actually fake a heart attack.
Really seems like you could get some legal seperation papers in place that will make you not resposible for his medical bills.
I would love to see the look on a Judges face when you tell this story. Then again..I bet they have heard it all.
As some of you also go thru, and I'm sure you understand
Especially since he's not working, I find it difficult to post back at times.
I do read the replies...but if hears me typing, he will be in the room seeing what I'm doing.
I HAVE talked with an attorney.He feels we should just file and *call his bluff*
But I don't think he's bluffing. And the attorney doesn't have nothing to lose.
I could lose it all.....and still owe him for my divorce.
After talking with family and friends.
We think my best option is to keep encouraging him to keep applying for a job WITH medical ins.
Then to file ASAP.
As far as them treating him for a heart attack.
My son and daughter are both nurses at Cleveland clinic.
And after asking around they told me .
They would do as little as possible to stabilize him if he doesn't have insurance.
BUT since his records show he still had 65% blockage in arteries of the heart they MAY do
angioplasty and do the stent for fear of lawsuit if he did indeed die.
Between that...and care on the cardio floor for even a day or so could very well come close or more the 100.000 I have in this house.
Debbi