My husband was deported in May 2005 before our son turned 1. Our son was born with a birth defect and was in hospital for 7 months. That is why I have a deep hatred for Citizenship and Immigration Canada!! I visited my husband 4 times during the 1st year he got depoted, and it was great! I then had no job, no money and was unable to visit him for quite a while. Now, I had submitted a sponsorship application for him, but he never got around to getting his fingerprints sent up here for the application because he had no money (which I do understand. He is in Honduras and the country is so unstable and full of poverty; very sad). I had no money to send, so our application exceeded the time limit and was dropped. I was so frustrated after all I had done for him to come here that I decided to cheat on him (I am not using this as an excuse...I am human and made a mistake). To this day I do not understand what compelled me to do this. I was happy with my husband, love him, I just don't understand! I decided to tell him because I am not the type who can keep a secret and he went crazy. Literally. He began to drink quite heavily and phone me when he was drunk professing love for me, but not want to talk to me while sober. In about March a friend of his told me that he had a new girlfriend. When I asked him, he admitted it but told me that he was just lonely. Since then, he will tell me he loves me and wants to come up here and he is kicking her out of his house, and the next time I talk to him he tells me that he is still hurt and can never forgive me for what I did to him. I told him that he decided to take this to another level by getting this new girl pregnant. I actually phoned his new girlfriend because I am so angry all the time and actually asked her what she thinks she is doing (she knows he is married, even came to a party I threw for him while visiting him!!!) and she told me that she knows he's coming back for me. Then yesterday I poured my heart out on the phone and feel like I want to be with him again. I am in the process of getting he and my son citizenship in Europe (through myself), a process that can tae 3 more years! I am so lost and confused and don't know what to make of this. I am going to see a psychotherapist on Monday and hope she will help. What I feel at this moment is that everyone is giving me such good reasons to not be with him, but I cannot deny the love I have for him in my heart. My son is a constant reminder of him and I can't handle it.
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