Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I recently broke up with my boyfriend. My gosh, this already sounds ridiculous....Anyway, I am typically the one to always put effort in and to pick up the phone and call him or text. HOWEVER, for the first time in the history of our unstable relationship I FINALLY put my foot down and today is one week that we haven't spoken. Note that he has not contacted me whatsoever. This is not a surprise to me.
I'm wondering how to stand my ground and not give in to the temptation to call or text. I feel weakness and vulnerability because I am also dealing with the loss of my Mother.
I know he is not right for me and I can only have control of what I do or not do.
Anyone have some helpful hints?
Joy
I'm wondering how to stand my ground and not give in to the temptation to call or text. I feel weakness and vulnerability because I am also dealing with the loss of my Mother.
I know he is not right for me and I can only have control of what I do or not do.
Anyone have some helpful hints?
Joy
-
I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
My reaction to letting go us much like an addict's to giving up their drug. I have to keep myself busy, and every time I think of calling, I have to tell myself "why don't I just wait 5 more minutes" or "why don't I do the dishes first, and then see if I still want to call". If I can keep myself busy enough, I get through another day, and it gets easier with each passing day.
Hugs to you.
Good luck and my sympathies for the loss of your mom, sug.
Everytime I had to stop myself. Just like the last response, my dignity hit me in the face and said, why are you doing this. Why would I let her know she had this control over me still.
I found other ways to handle it even if it was just sitting by myself.
I just realized last week my dog got sick and for the first time, she wasnt even in my thoughts to call her. Except an after thought that if something happened to my dog, I am going to get my other one back from her.
Is there someone else you can call instead? Maybe write in your journal. Surf the web, wathc a movie... walk around your house, saying out loud what you wanted to say on the phone. it aint crazy, but could help get that out so you can relax enough to just be at ease
Where calling or texting is concerned just try and remind yourself of your own self worth.You agree based on your post that this was an unhealthy relationship.
To "give in " is human especially under the situation and if you do so that doesn't make you a bad person.But also realize that from a guys perspective..if you do you are giving HIM the power..over you and over the situation.He is not worthy of that so be steadfast and as others have said keep busy.:)
_Savery1
Right after my husband left, I redid the window treatments, touched up the paint, redid the landscaping, and did spring cleaning (in the fall). I can only say that I feel so much better when time goes by, and I have had my mind on something else.
Good luck to you.
It is like an addiction. One day at a time, one hour at a time.
My condolences for your great loss.