Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hi This is my first time posting, It's been a tough year 14 months or so. He moved out and was gone for 8 months, 8 months I spent looking at what I'd done wrong, what I needed, wanted and Loved from My husband. Knowing when I was done, that I love him, love him enough to make it work.
He lost his Job in June, and moved home (ok now I see that was more about the job than me, but I believe that when God opens a door you have to walk thru and have faith)
In october he told me he didn't care how I felt, or what I felt, and wanted a divorse. Things are moving fast and furious.
My daughters and I moved out (I didn't want the memories of our life together around me everyday, on top of the responsibility for the big house) he changed the locks immediately.
He's taken over our retail business, and has his "girl" friend working there now.
Things could be final with in a month or two. He's moving on....
So how do I?? I still Love him, even when I hear he's been cheating on me since 2001. even though he's been lying to me for so long. Even though he doesn't love me.
I am a strong christain. One who believes in "till death do us part" my one and only (which he has been, I'm his 4th) I believe in forgivness and hanging on thru the tough times. BUT I can't hang on if he isn't ....
.... So How do I let go??
Thanks for thoughts, prayers and input.
Lori
He lost his Job in June, and moved home (ok now I see that was more about the job than me, but I believe that when God opens a door you have to walk thru and have faith)
In october he told me he didn't care how I felt, or what I felt, and wanted a divorse. Things are moving fast and furious.
My daughters and I moved out (I didn't want the memories of our life together around me everyday, on top of the responsibility for the big house) he changed the locks immediately.
He's taken over our retail business, and has his "girl" friend working there now.
Things could be final with in a month or two. He's moving on....
So how do I?? I still Love him, even when I hear he's been cheating on me since 2001. even though he's been lying to me for so long. Even though he doesn't love me.
I am a strong christain. One who believes in "till death do us part" my one and only (which he has been, I'm his 4th) I believe in forgivness and hanging on thru the tough times. BUT I can't hang on if he isn't ....
.... So How do I let go??
Thanks for thoughts, prayers and input.
Lori
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
It is tough, seems when there is no hope, God lifts me up and says "look child, I love you". Feel free to browse my journals and if you like, send me a friend request. I am living proof that survival happens. Big hug.
hugs
Erica
But that does not give the otehr person carte blanche to cheat on you (remember "forsaking all others"?).
It takes both people in a marriage to make it work. If one person gives up, it's not going to work. It sounds like he's already made his decision, and by taking him back, all you're doing it reinforcing that he can do whatever he wants and you're not going to leave.
Infidelity is one of the biblical reason for getting a divorce.
Yes, we want those vows to mean something. But if one-half of the marriage isn't playing by the ground rules...game over.
Kind of unbelievable. Is there more to it?
but, through out the bible, there are examples of when it OK to let go. Ask a friend or your pastor to help you with this.
on the pain part, well....time will help .... also I found out that the more I was away from him... the clearer I saw him for what he was... a liar from the start of our 22 yrs...
try to find the old you, the one deep inside and nurture her! it for your own good and for your kids.
one day a light bulb will go off... and you will still care but you will be released from the pain of loving him to the dept of your soul.
GOD is with you every step of the way. Never leaving you or forsaking you. Always, always there for you. Call out to him when you are sad.
take-care
I'm sorry for your pain. There will come a time when the wounds aren't as open and fresh.