am i out of my mind? i find myself so happy that i have accomplished goals that i have had for myself- but the only reason why i have these goals is because my entire life has changed over the past month. if i was still in the truck i wouldnt be doing what i am doing. why do i have this urge to call him and tell him so he can be proud of me and share in the progress ive made? its so twisted- he has been so mean. why do i want to share the joy with him? why do i worry about him still? why when he said i belonged in a mental institution? and that he was going to rip the heads off my stuffed animals and/or throw them away? i am not going to call him- but i want to share with him- i miss his place in my life, even if its not the same place that it was. does anyone else go thru this? i mean- how cruel does he have to be before i let go? am i in that much need of mental help? does anyone else go thru this?
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