I miss my husband so much, but there are days when I wish he had not come home from Afghanistan or Iraq. I followed him around the world for 18 yrs and several deployments. Most recently he spent a yr in Iraq and 6mnth in Afghanistan. At least if he had not come home, I could still have the illusion that he loved me. Now, all I am left with his the words "I don't love you, and I am not sure I ever did". How awful is it that I would rather him be dead than to have had him abandon us?
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