Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
There was a time, not that long ago, where all I wanted was for the ex to come back and we would work out our problems and live happily ever after. I have been keeping that hope alive for a while now not even realizing that somewhere along the line, what I wanted changed.
Yesterday, I had a visit from one of his inner circle. She came in to tell me that he was going to be calling me to apologize and ask to come back. Usually these visits would leave me excited and getting ready. Yesterday, I just got a sick feeling in my stomach and the hope changed from an 'oh really, I hope so!' into an 'oh geez. I hope not'. At this point, everthing is changed. We can never go back to the way it was and I don't want to be with him any other way. I trusted and he betrayed. Why on earth would I want to be with someone who has proven himself untrustworthy? It would be lifelong misery to sit at home and wonder what he is doing and who he is with. I have had enough misery at this man's hands.
While I am far from being "over" the situations that brought me here. I have decided I will no longer hope for a life of misery and invite it back in. Instead I will hope for a life with peace of mind, belief that I did not deserve bad things to happen to me and the ability to trust again.
Yesterday, I had a visit from one of his inner circle. She came in to tell me that he was going to be calling me to apologize and ask to come back. Usually these visits would leave me excited and getting ready. Yesterday, I just got a sick feeling in my stomach and the hope changed from an 'oh really, I hope so!' into an 'oh geez. I hope not'. At this point, everthing is changed. We can never go back to the way it was and I don't want to be with him any other way. I trusted and he betrayed. Why on earth would I want to be with someone who has proven himself untrustworthy? It would be lifelong misery to sit at home and wonder what he is doing and who he is with. I have had enough misery at this man's hands.
While I am far from being "over" the situations that brought me here. I have decided I will no longer hope for a life of misery and invite it back in. Instead I will hope for a life with peace of mind, belief that I did not deserve bad things to happen to me and the ability to trust again.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
Stay strong.
I couldnt be happier that you came to this realization on your own. it is huge to be aware that you would not ever trust him again, and that would like to conflict and pain. Who needs that?
I'd rather be happy in a shack that miserable in a castle.
Is the rearviewmirror officially thrown out the window????
but for you...i say rock on sista! that's awesome & it gives me hope that i will be able to find that same place.
thanks for the post.
Now I wish he would just go away and leave me alone...
I have made it clear what I require of a husband, and he has made it clear he is not willing to do those things (rebuild trust) and I will accept no less.
Good for you, stand your ground. If he is willing to do what it takes to rebuild a life with you, than think long and hard about it, if not... show him the door... You deserve better than what he gave you!!!
(((hugs)))