all i have done is try to take the high road and keep emotions in check is not easy and hope u find the strenght to make it through. big hugs to u --u can do this

To your best to avoid him. Busy yourself with the friends that will be there. Focus on the friend whose birthday it is.

Hold your head up, focus on your friends.

I know this might sound trite, but I had to learn this too....

DON'T GIVE HIM ANY OF YOUR PERSONAL POWER!

I know it's far easier said than done, believe me! But give it a try and celebrate with your friend.

You can do this. ((((((BIG HUG))))))))

Look like a knockout and plaster a smile on your face and think about the people who DO love you--drink a cup of coffee or something stronger for courage and leave as soon as you need to--if you just put in a brief appearance, at least you'll have been brave. Good luck and I'll say a prayer for you!

That's tough. I couldn't go. I work in the same building as my ex and I wont' even leave my desk because I want to avoid seeing him (especially since he likes to be with other women in the building in places where he knows I'd see him). Asshole. Anyway... Like Birken said, look drop dead gorgeous. Make him remember what he lost. And try to look happy, laugh and smile all the time. If there's another guy you like, flirt a little. DO NOT look at your ex. Pretend you did not even notice he was there. I'm not capable of doing most of this, altho I make sure to look good in case the asshole sees me in the building, but I suck at the acting happy shit. Hopefully you can pull it off better than I can.

Does your very good friend know about you and your stbx being split? I would consider calling your friend and explaining the situation. If they are as good a friend as you say they should understand. I wouldn't be able to do it.

Thank you all so much... I just got out of the shower and gonna get myself all looking purrrtty... I will fake a smile just like he faked being happy (except I wont use POT) it is gonna be difficult but I will try my best and if I feel the urge to deck the SOB I will tell my GF we need to get out ASAP... Not gonna drink cuz I will lose control then so I will fake it and smile...thanks you all ROCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK... I will let you all know how it turns out...(((hugs)))

Woo hoo!!! Go NJ!!!

go girl and smile lick u really doing great

I heard somebody say the other day that the best way to get revenge is to live your life well. I think that it could be helpful in your situation. Although you love him, act like he doesn't bother you and that you're ok. Mingle and talk and be the best you can be without too much emotions running wild. Easier said than done I'm sure, but I think you can do it!

Go Be Classy, when you see him, see him just as you described him as a big hemroid festering asshole, all hairy and stanky....sort of like when you had to get up in front of the class in school and envisioned your classmates as being naked.....you will be fine

dress up and look your best. breeze in and stay for 15 mins or so. Pay your respects to your friend and say that you have to head out but just wanted to stop by.

i agree with others, keep your head held high, smile, and then get out of there before anything gets ugly. (if you stay all night it will be awkward, one way or another)

If you can go somewhere else instead of home, since you are looking fine anyway!

Dress up and look your best. Don't cry or do anything that will get you into trouble--avoid alcohol. If he speaks to you, cooly say hello and then walk away.

I agree with JennyLyn, I don't know that I would stay too long.

Hugs and good luck to you.

dont go dont go..its not worth it

and since i'm late on this - hoping you check in to tell if you did or not

OK I am home.... AMEN... I held my head high I acted with pure class and I stayed till after 12:30... The drunken Pot head was there the whole time also... So to make a long story (see my journal entry) short. I had a good time I danced all night didn't cry and came out with a new attitude... He was so wasted it was sad. I caught him looking at me dancing and I turned away. When I looked at him and saw him drunk high and just sitting there he looked miserable but this is the life style that he wants I guess...so when I left I was thinking I am doing the right thing.... It's sad but I can't live that life style I am better then that. I am so Proud of myself I rose above this and did it with my head high and with class.... AMEN... and now i can say "I Love you Wayne" but I refuse to live like this I deserve better and I am better..

I am doing the biggest happy dance for you right now!!

Good for you!!