my boyfriend & i are in a argument literally at this minute. I need help in wording what i want to say. it seems to me everything i say sounds like a threat or ultimatum. he is acting distant & kindof sarcasticky rude like a little brother kindo of rude except i am tellng him he's hurting my feelings so he turns it on me & acts like i;m starting a fight with him & then he says you know i don't have time for this i;m at work. the thing that gets me is i know he's full of shit. But everything that comes out my mouth or even that i can think of sounds like a threat or ultimatum. i just want to know whats with the attitude & get an honest answer without him being so defensive . I said it simply like" hey whats with the attitue>" i even tried very hard to be up & happy while on the phone(which is where one sided hurtfest is happeneing) I just tried in a calm (not whiny) voice to ask what was up & he just starts to say i gotta go i don;t have time for this & why do i always start a argument. Then after he was rude to me then he hung up in my face , it brought me to tears. & i know he's calling me back on his lunch break but i don't even know what i should say that can get what i want out of the conversation & not have my words misinterpreted or turned around on me. I tend to get mad & maybe don't say what i should to get what i want
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