Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
How do I do it?
How do I just forget the man that I love and move on? I've had no closure. That last time we spoke everything was fine. We said goodbye that morning and told each other "I love you, talk to you tonight." Then 2 days later he's emailing me telling me he can never talk to me again... but he'll email and keep in touch.
The last time I heard from him was the 21st of January. I don't know if he is alive or dead. If he's in the hospital or not... (he has heart problems).
I know I need to move on and I have been trying. But my heart is holding me back. How do I let go? I keep hoping he'll call me one day and say that he's sorry for putting me through all this pain and crap and that he wants to be with me. That he's broken free of his family (very controlling family) and everything is going to be okay.
I'm so lonely and scared. I've tried no contact and well... that doesn't go over well. I keep emailing him yet I get nothing in response. I've tried dating.. ugh bad move there. Nobody is like him... he is/was so sweet and caring and I loved him I still do. So damned gorgeous too!!
I tried keeping busy.. but that can't be done 24 hours a day.
What did you do? how did you do it? I know some of you have moved on and I need to know how... please? I feel like I'm dying on the inside this week... I've been so good up until now too... why does this hit me so suddenly and then the world looks so bleak and dreary without him in it. :(
How do I just forget the man that I love and move on? I've had no closure. That last time we spoke everything was fine. We said goodbye that morning and told each other "I love you, talk to you tonight." Then 2 days later he's emailing me telling me he can never talk to me again... but he'll email and keep in touch.
The last time I heard from him was the 21st of January. I don't know if he is alive or dead. If he's in the hospital or not... (he has heart problems).
I know I need to move on and I have been trying. But my heart is holding me back. How do I let go? I keep hoping he'll call me one day and say that he's sorry for putting me through all this pain and crap and that he wants to be with me. That he's broken free of his family (very controlling family) and everything is going to be okay.
I'm so lonely and scared. I've tried no contact and well... that doesn't go over well. I keep emailing him yet I get nothing in response. I've tried dating.. ugh bad move there. Nobody is like him... he is/was so sweet and caring and I loved him I still do. So damned gorgeous too!!
I tried keeping busy.. but that can't be done 24 hours a day.
What did you do? how did you do it? I know some of you have moved on and I need to know how... please? I feel like I'm dying on the inside this week... I've been so good up until now too... why does this hit me so suddenly and then the world looks so bleak and dreary without him in it. :(
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I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????
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A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
I can't say that I know completely how you feel as my relationship ended differently, but I do get the letting go part. It just takes time. I know that something you don't want to hear as I didn't want to hear it either......I wanted to do something that would work IMMEDIATELY! It just hard to let go of something that was such a huge part of your life.
I wish I was more help. (((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))
I also think you have to accept that it is over between you. It is clear that he is not responding to your emails.
I know this is painful for you. Hugs.
I'll get over this... I just wish I had a date to tell my heart - as of February 28th you'll be better and you won't hurt anymore and you'll move on and find a new love... not one as great as he was... but a second best love.
sigh... when great love is rejected everything shuts down... it hurts and in time you do move on. But nobody will ever be good enough for that great love again. You will find somebody to love but they will be loved second best.
Do you have friends around that can hang out with you, maybe catch a movie, cook dinner together, take a walk-- anything, just to occupy yourself and try to get your mind off of him even if only for a few moments?
It sounds like you are waiting for him to just come back, and that you may be giving yourself some false hope in the form of fantasies (like the one where he breaks free of his controlling family.) Something HAS happened -- he has cut off contact with you for some reason, one which you may never know, and one that may very well be out of your control. Regardless, you really need to take care of YOU, and try to get through this. And you WILL get through this. I know, it is SO cliche, but time helps, and it has only been a few weeks. Cut yourself some slack, allow yourself to grieve, and be kind to yourself.
(((((((((((((Rj)))))))))))))))))
Obviously, not kissing or getting to serious. Just coffee dates and try to have fun.
Have you gone to a counsellor yet? I have and think I need to keep going too. :(
We'll get through it just takes a long time.
I would journal, talk to friends....and do your things that you like doing. It's okay to feel alone, or upset.....do let your feelings out...don't hold them in.
I wish I could help more....
Last year on Vday he asked me well committed to me and our marriage. We set the date that day... and wrote our vows together. I remember everything. He actually asked me to marry him on the 28th of January. But the 14th was made special by setting the date and writing our vows...
*takes a deep breath*
I can't make him come back to me, I can't make him choose me over his family... I can just be me and live the best way I can...
right?
Ugh why doesn't that help?!
Zach may not be able to give you that closure, so you can move on. You know that many here never get the closure part from their ex. You are going to have to create your own closure.
You need to give yourself time. You have a raw, gaping, wound and those take care and time to heal. It's been only a short amount of time that all this has happened. You know as well as anyone that it takes longer than this to move on past the loss of a relationship with someone you love.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Give yourself time. See the grieving for what it is, honor it, and tend to it . You've been through a lot, but you can get through this.
(((((((((((((((((RJ)))))))))))))))))
Pain and grief always do.
(((((((RJ)))))))
I guess I was living in doubt and a bit of a dream world. I knew he was having a hard time... but I figured he was strong enough to get over it and move on... with me.
I have to wonder though. Am I grieving the loss of my love or the fact that here I am 36 years old and single and childless?
We had dreams... a lot of them. Dreams that I thought never would come true. Here I am yet again with my dreams crashing into the rocks. I feel very unfulfilled and not good enough for anything or anyone.
Blah... Where did my positivity and great outlook on life go?!
So I guess I can't answer yes to all your questions... there was one No... sigh :(