damn.... i'm getting tired of typing the same thing, but it still applies.

run fast, and as far away as possible.

truth

What Lane said! OK here's the deal...I got cheated n pretty bad...I have a male friend who is cheating on his wife..he has daughters. So one day he's making all these excuses for cheating and I said to him..."on the day that your first daughter gets married, remember all these excuses, and think of them commin g out of the mouth of your daughter's new husband's mouth!".

Run...for your life, you deserve better!

That was excellent courier. I will remember that. In fact I just called and let that on my stbx's voice mail.

Everyone is someone's daughter/son, grandchild, niece, nephew etc. When you take that viewpoint it really hits home. I don't have a daughter, just a son...but if I had a daughter and some man pulled on her what my recent ex pulled on me....well I'd be loading my pistol right now!

My son's divorce will be final any day now. His wife didn't cheat on him..but the things she did do...well lets just say i never need to see her again...EVER!

Personaly, I would be talking to my atourny first thing tomarrow. Nobody diserves to go though what you are going trought right now.

I agree with everyone here. Cut your losses now. Granted you won't see a dime but it will be better than supporting him and possibly have him stealing from you to help her out! This bit about having to 'stay friends' so she won't keep the baby out of spite. That's just beyond sick on BOTH sides; his and hers!

Leave that trash in the gutter, walk away with your pride and dignity. Thank God that He graced you with you that! It's sure missing in your husband and OW.

Sorry you have been so mis-treated. Don't stick around for more!

Let me get this straight, he is either on the phone with her or at her house every day and he says he is doing that for you. oh girl what lane said

I think that it is too easy for everyone to say dump him and get an attorney, yes in the best of situations you are strong enough to do that, but it does take time. As Lane said "run fast" yes I agree, but it is certainly not that easy. You will know when you are ready, you don't need any of us here to tell you what he has done is wrong and what he is still doing is wrong. If we all could just run, then noone would be on here. I say that you do what you feel that is best for you, it will come to you. I know that I am still having a hard time making the right decision, it has only been two months, but I learn as I go and I come here to get suggestions, yes, but all situations are different. There are probably many things that we don't know about your husband, that only you know. I swear to you that you will know what to do for you, it will take time, but you will know.

ACTIONS Speak LOUDER THAN WORDS. He does not respect you. He is in his life for him. He's not considering your feelings if you feel you have to beg him. RED FLAG--RUN!

here's my two-cents from personal experience....words mean nothing if actions don't back them up. do you WANT to continue to be cheated on? if not---time to make a decision.

Wow. I am so sorry. What incredible bullshit - sorry but the word applies. I will send you a message so we can talk!

It doesn't sound like she is having an abortion..sounds like she is having a baby.

Not a big fan of OW..but she can, and should, handle her pregnancy however she wants to.

Affair aside..there are many other things that he is doing that would concern me.

Think carefully...and good luck!!

Well, this one almost passed me by completely. Cameron I may be the one person who know EXACTLY what you're going through. I have been married 6 years and separated 2. During out marriage we struggled a lot. I had a hard time because I found out that the person I thought was my best friend had involvments with other women up until the day before we got married. After we got married he insisted that they were friends and it was ok if they stayed in touch. He never came clean with the entire situation so it seemed she was always riding in our pockets. I suffered from depression and we struggled financially. Marriage was hard for me because I could never be who he needed me to be.

The story is very long but 3 years into our marriage on a visit to our hometown my husband slept with his old flame and 9 months later she had his child. I didn't get a clue to this until the child was a few months old. My husband denied everything. In my heart I knew this was his child. I didn't beat myself up. I stood up. I stood to myt feet and the world opened up for me like you wouldn't imagine. I got my 1st real job since moving to this state. I moved out. About 8 months later he admitted to having slept with this woman. It wasn't until recently he admitted to being the father of this child. We have no children and I wanted children badly. I tried even after all of this to fix my marriage but I was clear enough in my thoughts to see this was not to be. The only thing I ever asked my husband for was a child of my own. He gave it to someone else. I even tried to force myself to accept this child. Why should I? I don't have to. I refuse to live my life with a constant reminder of my husbands disrespect for me.

Choosing to stay in your marriage will mean disregarding your feels to have someone sleep next to you at night. This is something you have to figure out. You have to be woman enough to chose...you or them? Because he is no longer one person he is a man with a mistress and a child. Accepting him means accepting them.

My Dear,

Your husband does not place a high value on you. He thinks about his own selfish needs. Did he care that there was/is a possiblity that his daughter may have to disrupt ties with you. He think about the implications of making someone pregnant? NO!!!!!!!! Like Lane80 told you. run fast, and as far away as possible. LOVE YOURSELF

I am so sorry. You probably love him very much and this will be difficult but unless you can be sure that he will not do this again and can get his act together AND that you will be able to trust again, I am with the others. Leave him. It will hurt like hell but you deserve more than that.