Thats only normal, I was always wondering and sitting around waiting for the big blow up between them. We have to take the focus off them because it may never happen and we just make ourselves crazy. I will keep you in my prayers, I know it is very difficult but remember in time we will heal.

So, if it doesn't last are you hoping he will come back to you? It's time to let go. Find the value in yourself, you are not second best. Use this time to build yourself back up and than take the opportunity you have been given to find someone who deserves your loyalty.

Past behavior is the best predictor of future outcomes. He'll eventually cheat on her too. If he comes back to you he may cheat on you again. You're worth better than that. Remind yourself that if you dwell on things you can't changes your stuck. Think about where you want to be in the near future. Do things that get you there.

hey, kelly, do you care how my neighbors' friends' sisters' brother in law and his OW are?

why?

is it because it's none of your business, or maybe because it doesn't matter, or they're strangers, or who cares?

Well, there ya go.. treat your stbx and his ow the same.

Who cares. Good luck to them. It'll happen regardless of your concerns, worries or ignoring them completely.

;)

I'm sorry that you're having a bad day, kellyq. Unfortunately you have no control over the story that your thinking about (stbx and ow). You've got everything you need to build your own wonderful stories. You need to do that, and your daughter needs you to do that too.

I will be blunt.......you need to stop dwelling and thinking about them. That was my biggest hill I had to climb. Forcing myself several times a day to NOT think about my X and the OW.
Once I did.....wow...were things better for me inside. And now......well....now I'm %110 better. Just think....is he wondering or crying over you or about you while your crying and struggling? Prolly not.....so dont give him that space in your mind. I know its easier for me to say this all now.....but its only cause I was there....I know, I remember, I understand. Take care and stay strong ((hugs))

Totally agree with SC's response...reread it again and again and again. You deserve far better than to have them waste that space in your head.

i couldn't agree more with sc2

Don't think about it, you are putting too much energy. Focus on yourself and take it one day at a time!!!!

I will pray for you to have the strength that you need to stop thinking about him and her.

I know how you are feeling somewhat. All I keep thinking about is the future. Will he get married again..will he have kids..etc..

Take care!

You are not responsible for what enters your mind, but you are responsible what you do with it after it get there.

I usually just start shaking my head and say no no no, we are not going there. They are gone and have free will to do as they wish. We are also free now to do anything we desire also.

I pray that you will find freedom to go live your life.

I am right there with you. I do well for a while, but then it invades my thoughts at the oddest and most inconvenient time. Then the thoughts just won't leave. It is driving me crazy.

When this happened months ago, I would mentally tell the thoughts to "go away." I read a post where someone else says "next." I need a new mantra.