Karen is leaving for college next week. I found this out when I called her and was told her dad is taking her to Evansville (ISU) next week. Of course, he never bothered to consult me - I'm just her mother. I feel this white hot rage at him for shutting me out of my daughter's daily life and especially major events like starting college. I agreed to allow her to stay with her dad when I moved out (for those who don't know me - the OW was my next door neighbor) so she could finish high school. I never dreamed that would mean she would listen to her dad's BS and believe the lies he feeds her everyday. She never wants to spend the night. My phone calls only occasionally get returned and are then short and sweet. And the visits are few and far between. We were meeting on Sunday afternoons but even that has fallen by the wayside since she started working. I HATE him and that resentment is causing me health problems and lack of sleep. I cried myself to sleep for a year and thought I was doing better. Then this happens and I feel the rage return. What did I ever do to deserve her rejection - or his rejection for that matter? I never stopped loving Karen and feel like a part of my heart has been cut out of me. My divorce was final a year ago April - when will the healing begin? When will the pain subside? I tried counseling [he just wrote me a prescription and told me to keep busy], read self-help books, pray - but the hurt keeps on hurting. Sometimes I want to go to sleep and never wake up! I am open to any advice you can give me, my DS friends. What do you do to cope?
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