Yes, it's one of the biggest healing moments you'll have.

Forget the idea of "someone completing you", you need to be complete on your own first before you enter a relationship.

Being complete on your own takes time, but it's extremely doable.

no you were always there.. you stop sacrificing.. stop making excuses, you stop hiding bad behaviour and learn about you, who you really are, how you really feel about crap and you bloom.....

I know I'll become whole again. He'll still be a spineless, cheating, broke, less than part-time parent, with a Peter Pan complex. If that makes him a "whole" person...more power to him! Not MY problem anymore. ;-) You'll be FINE CJ! You are whole already.

I think that's one of the horrible things in our society. Single people are made to feel as if they aren't whole people unless they are in a relationship. We grow up with that stigma ... .that you can't be happy on your own, that you have to be part of a couple .... when in reality, I think most people really aren't ready to be in a relationship until they feel whole already.

You don't need someone to complete you. However, it would be nice if you had someone to compliment you.

Marriage is not about half's. It is when 2 unique individuals join together as one. When one of those parts breaks off, you still remain whole, valuable & unique. As for the other "0ne"... who cares. They dug a hole and now they can go lay in it.

I bloom... I think I like that... Bloom... cool!

And, Pasta, I like that word doable... it reminds me of the word adorable...

Maybe I can be an adorable bloom... huh? RIGHT!!! Haha!

Everything in life is doable.

Yeah, Nighthawk, they dug a hole, they get to lay in it, and we are still stuck sleeping alone in a bed made for us...
Reminds me of the song, "Sleeping single in a double bed"...

I know how that feels CJ. We just have to have some faith that some day we will find someone to share that bed with who is as caring and loving as we are. This sounds a btter prospect than th hole. In the meantime, we should try to find ourselves again. New begginnings.

I love the responses to this very good question, which I might easily have asked myself. And they're right -- you have to be whole yourself to begin with. The hard part is, in some relationships (like mine, and maybe yours too), you sacrifice so much to please the other person that you do in some ways become "half a person."

It was so bad sleeping alone that I let my daughter sleep in my bed with me the first couple of months... not for anything vulgar, so please don't think anything bad, but it gave me a feeling of not being alone.
I'm still living at my sister's house. I have never lived alone. Not ready for that step... Way not ready... just got the chills down my back...
I wonder if I was able to live in my own home if I would feel like a whole person?

Although our sacrifices and all the pouring out we have done for our "Love" leave us feeling empty, we need to realize that it was NOT in vain. Our feelings and deeds were true and therefore have meaning to God and who we really are. Sometimes it was rough to give away so much of ourselves but didn't it have it's own reward at the time? Just because our "other half" doesn't appreciate it, doesn't mean that they are not appreciated. Those with committment like us are needed to balance out the negatives in the world.

" And the two shall become ONE flesh" Matthew 19:6

Having the other person "removed" so to speak is a painful surgery and the healing process can take some time. You were part of a whole and are now still whole - just by yourself. It takes a while to realize this but we are all still whole - even without our spouses by our side.

either with the W or Without it

Nighthawk, you are right... in the end, we do feel empty... I know that God knows what I have done & I know that all I have done for that man was the right thing to do, but I also feel that I have wasted 20 years of my life on a man that never appriciated anything I did for him... It really hurts. That is more than half my life... He started out with a sweet, innocent 16 year old girl, turned her into a woman, promised to grow old together, and then turned on her when she wasn't that "girl he met"...
Yes, I've changed... He has changed me... molded me into what he wanted... his "woman"... his "b*tch"... his relief valve for his way too high sex drive, telling me he "needed" it...
I started out as my parents child, went to his woman, his other half, then he squashed me to nothing, so I don't even feel like a half, I feel like a nothing... I just realized that while I was typing it...