I'm sorry that you feel that way.

The only way to end darkness is to be a candle.
I hope you'll stay and be a positive influence.

I've been busy moving my friend's list over, haven't seen any negativity here, wouldn't like it either.

I like the candle analogy. Believe me, I have rallied against negativity here for months and months.

And I am starting to identify some bad apples here, fyi. Lets not let them spoil the bunch, eh?

Kulia, don't leave on others' account! Don't worry - if the police actually respond, they cannot substantiate ANYTHING. I believe most parents don't react well when they think their children might be running into the street at night. You could help and put in a good word to support someone if necessary....?

Tup is absolutely right, don't let a few people push you away from the support you are obviously receiving here. Avoid the negative threads and the negative people.

Yeah but its 78 there. We get nasty cabin fever being locked in all day with 26 degrees outside. Try to understand that one. I think you should stay. If it gets warm out we are all nice folks really!!!!!!

I'm just so surpised how long the berating of S1 is going on, and put downs to others as well. So I just stop reading that post. I feel really good about what I told S1 and he is happy with me as well it seams. When you know better, you do better. So, I just stop reading the post, but now it shows up in others. Just puts a bad feeling in me.

I am sorry you feel that way also. I just began the DS journey a few days ago. Sometimes I don't know how to take things. Most importantly, I feel we should have freedom to speak the way we feel at that time. It helps me learn the perspectives of all different people. It helps me gauge whether to be hopeful again or to be more cautious with everyone around me. It also helps me realize how thankful I am to have worked through the pain. Maybe the 17 years of marriage actually paid off. I would never dream of using my kids and neither would he...as messed up as he is...never. I beg everyone to have some compassion for your x, it comes back to you and your kids in the long run.

Don't do it, I have made the comment that there are a lot of emotions here and we are all in different stages of getting thru this mess we call divorce. We all have our own ways of handling things.
Some people here just get carried away. Its easier to slam somebody or tear somebody down to make themselves look good as opposed to taking the time to building them up here. Some people have not figured that out yet. We NEED you sense of humor here, don't leave.

Kulia,

I am sorry you feel the need to leave.
I understand your frustration with the current state of negativity, and I wish it would change.
But the only way it's going to change is if people hang around and try to make it more positive.
There's that candle analogy. There's the quote from Ghandi, "You must be the change you wish to see in the world."
But you don't have to go. Don't log in for a few days maybe. But there's going to be times when this place will be able to help you out.

I was shocked by that thread as well, but, please don't go. I think there are some really good people here. Don't let one bad apple spoil the bunch ( is that how the saying goes?)

Do what I do and ignore it. Focus on the things that help you and ignore the rest. But, if you must. Take care.

Kulia, all, read the daily snips posts, too by Larry - good example of why you should stay.

Very true....I do love Larry!

Hi Kulia

The negativity gets to me too. Seems to be so much more than when I got here in August. I find myself spending less time on DS than before.

But I'm not ready to leave. I still gleen support and advice from people here that help me.

I just try to avoid the topics or the people who I don't care for.