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deleted_user
Okay, I'd love some opinions from you guys, so please chime in...
Sometimes I really miss flirting and affection (not sex, but cuddling). I have a male friend -- not a really close or good male friend, but a nice guy who is interested in me and with whom I have been VERY clear about my emotional unavailability with. I'm not sure he is really accepting what I am saying because he has made comments about being happy to be my friend but wanting to see if anything more could develop someday (and I know I would not ever want a relationship with him, we are too different). My question is this ... every now and again I am tempted to invite him over to watch a movie and allow myself to sit on the couch with him and be "g-rated" affectionate -- maybe even kiss him (I REALLY miss kissing; my husband was a lousy kisser and I love to kiss) but I never extend the invite, something makes me hold off. I don't want to lead him on or do it and feel "Eeeew" in my head and not ever want it to happen again after I've opened that window. He keeps saying he is OK with anything I am ready for and nothing more, BUT. Have any of you allowed yourselves to seek companionship that involved affection from a friend, and did it turn out OK or was it a bad idea? I miss flirting, hanging out with a man, etc.
Signed, Sleepless in Sacramento
Sometimes I really miss flirting and affection (not sex, but cuddling). I have a male friend -- not a really close or good male friend, but a nice guy who is interested in me and with whom I have been VERY clear about my emotional unavailability with. I'm not sure he is really accepting what I am saying because he has made comments about being happy to be my friend but wanting to see if anything more could develop someday (and I know I would not ever want a relationship with him, we are too different). My question is this ... every now and again I am tempted to invite him over to watch a movie and allow myself to sit on the couch with him and be "g-rated" affectionate -- maybe even kiss him (I REALLY miss kissing; my husband was a lousy kisser and I love to kiss) but I never extend the invite, something makes me hold off. I don't want to lead him on or do it and feel "Eeeew" in my head and not ever want it to happen again after I've opened that window. He keeps saying he is OK with anything I am ready for and nothing more, BUT. Have any of you allowed yourselves to seek companionship that involved affection from a friend, and did it turn out OK or was it a bad idea? I miss flirting, hanging out with a man, etc.
Signed, Sleepless in Sacramento
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Be really careful, good friends are few and far between.
He obviously wants something else.
If you invite him over, regardless of what you say, he's going to br expecting something. And that's more than you want.
Don't do it.
I know you miss that physical connection with someone, but you're playing with fire if he comes to your house.
BAD IDEA.
This guy WILL get hurt and/or you with your immediate state of newness. You miss companionship whcih all of us do, but things go sour in many ways, especially a you don't see him as a lover or a friend. Don't rely on a man to make you feel like you need to be wanted. You already are past that with this guy being so into you for whatever. You're simply stringing him along by doing this, so if you're not ready for something more, then you need to cut your ties since isn't really a good friend. there are two types, of men, err three, err four.
Relatives, lovers friends and strangers. He doesn't sound like he fits in any of these categories.
Nothing good can come from kisssing this guy.
Unless of course he kisses you like you've never been kissed before and you fall for him.
otherwise, keep your distance.